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A Brainwashed boy genius is busted out of his facility and joins the fight against the corporate system that taught him to win at all costs.
The story is in the telling. People don?t have to like your character, they have to understand your character. Characters have to be relatable not likeable. Now. It is a bit vague. It could be Amway or the Church. We need details. Plus the brainwashing seems to have no impact. Busting out implies heRead more
The story is in the telling. People don?t have to like your character, they have to understand your character. Characters have to be relatable not likeable.
Now. It is a bit vague. It could be Amway or the Church. We need details. Plus the brainwashing seems to have no impact. Busting out implies he was being held captive, but brainwashing would have had him as a willing participant.
He needs a goal ?make public the program?
He needs an obstacle ?corporate PR hiding the truth?
A boy genius being held by a corporation as a test subject joins the group that broke him out, they carry out raids to find the proof to expose the horrors in the name of science.
Probably not your story. But it has more detail.
We have his goal, revenge by exposing them, justice for the kids.
Obstacles, hidden info.
Action a series of raids.
Play with these ideas.
See lessWhen a medieval princess releases an evil spirit that intends to murder her husband, she must find a way to destroy the spirit and save her husband.
Answer these questions which I think we let the reader know how you intend to retell this story. What was she doing when she released the spirit? Not physically, but her goal. What is she doing to try and destroy the spirit? Why is it failing? The last bit of the logline is the entire movie and youRead more
Answer these questions which I think we let the reader know how you intend to retell this story.
What was she doing when she released the spirit? Not physically, but her goal.
What is she doing to try and destroy the spirit?
Why is it failing?
The last bit of the logline is the entire movie and you have jumped over the best bits.
See less“the sleight of hand”
After discovering a street magician is a real wizard an unemployed journalist must defend himself against a group of wizards willing to kill to keep that secret.
After discovering a street magician is a real wizard an unemployed journalist must defend himself against a group of wizards willing to kill to keep that secret.
See less