1. Posted: April 17, 2018In:

    After crime rate falls to zero, a lonely detective turns into a serial killer to challenge his fellow detectives.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    To challenge his fellow detectives a bit weak. Plus why did it fall to zero. Otherwise the line reads fine. The thing I would try to add is why emotionally. When crime drops to zero a detective addicted to the hunt becomes a serial killer to get his fix by trying evade his colleagues.

    To challenge his fellow detectives a bit weak. Plus why did it fall to zero. Otherwise the line reads fine. The thing I would try to add is why emotionally.

    When crime drops to zero a detective addicted to the hunt becomes a serial killer to get his fix by trying evade his colleagues.

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  2. Posted: April 9, 2018In:

    Does my logline work, is it clear and show the character, event, and action.

    Best Answer
    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    Can you give us a series of events that show how she overcomes prejudice etc.

    Can you give us a series of events that show how she overcomes prejudice etc.

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  3. Posted: April 6, 2018In:

    Working back late Halloween night, a small town teacher and some resentful students are terrorized in their own school by a masked killer.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    Students set out to terrorise a teacher working late on Halloween when they are set upon by a serial killer. They must now work with their teacher if they hope to survive the night. Students must work with the teacher they set out to terrorise when they are set upon by a serial killer.

    Students set out to terrorise a teacher working late on Halloween when they are set upon by a serial killer. They must now work with their teacher if they hope to survive the night.

    Students must work with the teacher they set out to terrorise when they are set upon by a serial killer.

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