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After being cast out from a pack of wolves, an hybrid child is educated by a Djinn? to become the Egyptian god of the Dead Anubis.
If pitching this to a Western production company, I suggest using the more familiar term "genie" rather than Djinn.What obstacle does? the child face that could defeat the genie's purpose?? Or what arduous initiation rite must the child pass to become the deity of the dead?In drama, whatever a charaRead more
If pitching this to a Western production company, I suggest using the more familiar term “genie” rather than Djinn.
What obstacle does? the child face that could defeat the genie’s purpose?? Or what arduous initiation rite must the child pass to become the deity of the dead?
In drama, whatever a character’s calling or training,? it can’t be a sure thing he will fulfill his destiny.? Just the opposite.? In order to create tension and suspense, the odds must not be in his favor.?? I don’t (yet) get the sense from this logline that he’s more likely to fail than succeed..? Nor do I sense what, if any, are the personal stakes.? That is, what he stands to lose if he fails.
See lessWhen an exiled gangster turned priest discovers that his mother is dying, he must make peace with his ex partner in crime in order to return home.
Hmm.? If the priest's objective goal is to visit his mother, what is his subjective need for doing so? (Subjective needs are not usually explicitly stated in a logline, but it strengthens the logline when the subjective need is implicit.)
Hmm.? If the priest’s objective goal is to visit his mother, what is his subjective need for doing so? (Subjective needs are not usually explicitly stated in a logline, but it strengthens the logline when the subjective need is implicit.)
See lessWhen a prospective client invites himself to the first summer party at the law firm executive?s house, the executive must make sure the client is satisfied so he is won over while also dealing with new crises that arise in his home life.
Good rough draft rewrite by yqwertz.? There has to be something obvious at stake for the main character.
Good rough draft rewrite by yqwertz.? There has to be something obvious at stake for the main character.
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