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When a 16-year-old delinquent in a Tibetan refugee camp is recognized by the Dalai Lama as a reincarnated spritual leader, he finds himself a stranger in his own life.
>>>Yeah it was an unusual set of (true) circumstances, and the whole reason I thought it made a good story.Having the College of Cardinals intentionally select a woman to be pope would also make a good story. ?But how credible is that premise? ?How likely is that to happen?The premise of thRead more
>>>Yeah it was an unusual set of (true) circumstances, and the whole reason I thought it made a good story.
Having the College of Cardinals intentionally select a woman to be pope would also make a good story. ?But how credible is that premise? ?How likely is that to happen?
The premise of the story while interesting is, alas, counterfactual. ?There is a living Dali Lama; he is a free man; nor is he likely to become a prisoner. ?(The Chinese regime is corrupt and ?repressive it isn’t ?that stupid. They aren’t about to make a martyr out him — bad for international relations — and for business.) ?So the story would have to be set in a parallel universe or an indefinite future. ?And the logline would need to reflect that to overcome the questions I raised that will surely be in the mind of logline readers in the film industry (where the Dali Lama is a well-known and revered figure).
If the story is a comedy, a satire, a parody or a fantasy ?then you can break the rules of the real world; the audience implicitly understands and accepts this as a feature of the genre and will willingly suspend disbelief. ?But an audience implicitly assumes that a drama reflects real life, what is possible, even if improbable. ?If you’ve done your homework on Tibetan Buddhism and can prove ?that by tradition and precedent your scenario is possible, even if improbable, then it’s a viable story.
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Just saying.
See lessIn a world where most jobs have been taken over by AI’s, a drug addicted private investigator is hired to help an android detective solve a murder case that threatens the very foundations of society.
I have the same questions as Dkpough1. The threat "to the very foundations of society" is vague. ?It's needs to be specific.
I have the same questions as Dkpough1.
The threat “to the very foundations of society” is vague. ?It’s needs to be specific.
See lessWhen a wildly out of control teenager is kicked out of home, he escapes to LA with a mission to be famous only to be sucked into a vortex of crystal meth addiction, gay porn and prostitution but when he nearly dies from an overdose he undergoes a gruelling rehabilitation program in Bali with the only chance he has left to save his life.
This logline replicates all the issues in the previous iterations. ?Chief among them is that at 64 words it is too long. ?As pointed out in another posting on a statistical study of 675 loglines, the overwhelming majority of ?loglines for movies come in at 30 words or less, none exceed 40 words.So aRead more
This logline replicates all the issues in the previous iterations. ?Chief among them is that at 64 words it is too long. ?As pointed out in another posting on a statistical study of 675 loglines, the overwhelming majority of ?loglines for movies come in at 30 words or less, none exceed 40 words.
So as an exercise, I suggest cutting and trimming this down to no more than 40 words. ?I don’t know what those 40 words should be. It’s your story. ?All I know is that to get this logline read by the movers and shakers in Hollywood, you need to shorten it at least ?1/3.
For how to do that, I recommend basic guidelines for composing an industry standard logline covered ?under “Training” at the top of the web page.
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