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Jeopardizing his shot at reaching the "Final Four," a devout star athlete, raised under an assumed identity, must outwit his vengeful, on the lam mother to find his missing dad.
The math in the logline (and maybe the story) seems too complicated. How does her seeking revenge lead to him being removed from the team? What does she do that gets him kicked off the team? And why must he find his father? Not just want to find him, but MUST find him -- or else? What does he standRead more
The math in the logline (and maybe the story) seems too complicated.
How does her seeking revenge lead to him being removed from the team? What does she do that gets him kicked off the team?
And why must he find his father? Not just want to find him, but MUST find him — or else? What does he stand to gain by finding his father? What does he stand to lose if he fails? If he’s already off the team, then hasn’t he already forfeited his future in basketball? So what else is at stake? What else is there for him to lose?
What dramatic problem does finding his father solve?
See less?An unassuming young gentleman, still struggling to find his place in the world, must face off with the 19th Century?s greatest criminal Kingpin to rescue his childhood sweetheart from a life of sexual servitude and topple the criminal conspiracy which may lead all the way to the Royal Family?
In 19th Century London, a callow young man takes on England's most ruthless criminal kingpin who has kidnapped his childhood sweetheart and forced her into prostitution.
In 19th Century London, a callow young man takes on England’s most ruthless criminal kingpin who has kidnapped his childhood sweetheart and forced her into prostitution.
See lessJeopardizing his shot at reaching the "Final Four," a devout star athlete, raised under an assumed identity, must outwit his vengeful, on the lam mother to find his missing dad.
The problem I have with this logline is finding a causal connection between his parents and his prospects for playing in the final 4. How do his problematical folks jeopardize his shot (actually his team's) at making it to the final 4 (And why stop there?). Hasn't he already stayed on the team and pRead more
The problem I have with this logline is finding a causal connection between his parents and his prospects for playing in the final 4. How do his problematical folks jeopardize his shot (actually his team’s) at making it to the final 4 (And why stop there?).
Hasn’t he already stayed on the team and played a winning season even while his mother was the lam, his father missing? Or did they both suddenly go on the lam and missing as March madness was beginning?
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