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A mafia wife assumes control and seeks revenge for her husband?s murder, and when she discovers her daughter is pregnant by the son of the charming, handsome killer, she pursues a different path that forces her to come to terms with her own blossoming feelings for him.
Wow! Sounds like a fresh take on a too familiar subject. If you're aiming your logline at American production companies, I suggest making it clear that she takes over the family business after her husband's demise (because of the stereotype previously mentioned.) Best wishes.
Wow! Sounds like a fresh take on a too familiar subject.
If you’re aiming your logline at American production companies, I suggest making it clear that she takes over the family business after her husband’s demise (because of the stereotype previously mentioned.)
Best wishes.
See lessA mystically unnoticeable "Sea cliff" is the catalyst for the place of change. Story one is about an old lady, in all her alternative new age approach, change and moves on from grieving of her husband's death, before spreading his ashes into the ocean from the sea cliff. Story two is about an OCD, analytical & rigid couple, sick of their lifestyle, breaks their habits as for once they decide to go someplace chaotic(sea cliff), as they become intimate in there, later on, the once considered sterile couple are happy about becoming parents.
A magical cliff enables a widower to overcome her grief after her husband dies and a sterile couple to bear children. It seems more like more a premise for a plot, than a plot. It suggests dual story threads which can work when they are interrelated in theme. And what is the unifying theme? In one sRead more
A magical cliff enables a widower to overcome her grief after her husband dies and a sterile couple to bear children.
It seems more like more a premise for a plot, than a plot. It suggests dual story threads which can work when they are interrelated in theme.
And what is the unifying theme? In one story thread the natural world sucks because everyone has to die; in the other, it’s a crap shoot that won’t let some couples procreate?
See lessAfter reading a page from a spell book an incorrigible boy discovers a cursed princess trapped in a tree in his backyard. He must break the spell and save his father from his new girlfriend, the Witch.
Hmm. A protagonist can have a minor goal that is a necessary stepping stone [find the headpiece to the staff of Ra] to the major goal [recover the Ark of the Covenant]. But it is a taboo in modern screenwriting for the protagonist to have more than one major objective goal of equal import and not caRead more
Hmm.
A protagonist can have a minor goal that is a necessary stepping stone [find the headpiece to the staff of Ra] to the major goal [recover the Ark of the Covenant]. But it is a taboo in modern screenwriting for the protagonist to have more than one major objective goal of equal import and not causally linked.
In the revised logline it’s not clear to me what is the minor goal and what is the major goal. As written the boy seems to have two major objective goals: save the Princess; rescue his father. I presume the sequence is that the boy must rescue the princess from the curse [minor goal] in order save his father from the witch [major goal]. Or is it vica-versa?
Nor is it clear to me from the logline what the relationship is between the curse and the witch. I’m assuming it’s the witch who put the curse on the princess. But the logline doesn’t say that.
And, again, I have to make an assumption, that his ability to see her has something to do with reading a spell in a book. But I have no idea what the rule is in this alternate reality that enables the boy to see the princess by merely reading a book.
(And the general rule of thumb for sci-fi and fantasy genres is that a writer should only have ONE completely unrealistic/unscientific rule or gimmick introduced into an otherwise normal world. Any more than that will only confuse the audience. See “John Carter”: Disney took a US$ 150 million write off on that gawdawful mess.)
So I have to ask: what is the protagonist’s ONE major objective goal?
And what’s at stake? That is, what is the MOST IMPORTANT thing the boy stands to lose if he fails?
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