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When a apathetic policeman's new-born son is kidnapped he will do everything in his power to expose a corrupted Chinese state and it?s network of child traffickers to get his son back.
Isn't the story set in the China; ergo, the policeman is Chinese? I think this is a strong concept, lots of possibilities. But it's unclear to me whether the child traffickers operate: Because the system is corrupt in general. Or Because the authorities allow the child trafficking --they are paid ofRead more
Isn’t the story set in the China; ergo, the policeman is Chinese?
I think this is a strong concept, lots of possibilities. But it’s unclear to me whether the child traffickers operate:
Because the system is corrupt in general.
Or
Because the authorities allow the child trafficking –they are paid off to look the other way.
Or
Because the child-trafficking is run by the police.
As far as a “flaw”, how about a “loyal” policeman instead? To heighten the outrage: they’ve not only stolen his son, but his fellow cops and the system he blindly put his faith in, has betrayed his loyalty by not helping him.
It’s his fellow policemen who are apathetic.
So, something like:
When child-traffickers steal his new-born son, a loyal Chinese policeman must fight against apathetic superiors and a corrupt system to get his son back.
fwiw
See lessWith an uncanny ability to foresee death while painting, an artist’s prediction forces him to abandon his true love in order to save her.
And so he wins back her love -- and then she dies? Or he must win back her love if she is to live? What's really at stake?
And so he wins back her love — and then she dies?
Or he must win back her love if she is to live?
What’s really at stake?
See less"After his wife commits suicide, a renowned lifeguard learns that a close family member is the rapist. He must learn to forgive or drown in sea of anger and hate"
Why not just say so in the logline: "his brother"? "Close family member" is vague. It's no big story giveway if the reveal is in Act 1 or early in Act 2. After all, the plot seems to pivot on that information.
Why not just say so in the logline: “his brother”? “Close family member” is vague. It’s no big story giveway if the reveal is in Act 1 or early in Act 2. After all, the plot seems to pivot on that information.
See less