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When he enrols in a strict prep school, a rebellious teen recruits a geek to help him graduate, which makes him a target for the geek’s bullies.
P.S. "Wants to prove himself" is not only invisible, interior and subjective -- it's also vague. Prove *what* about himself? That's he's smart enough? That's he's brave enough? That's he stronger or faster than others? That he's not too old? That he's not too young? That other peoples' opinion of hiRead more
P.S. “Wants to prove himself” is not only invisible, interior and subjective — it’s also vague.
Prove *what* about himself? That’s he’s smart enough? That’s he’s brave enough? That’s he stronger or faster than others? That he’s not too old? That he’s not too young? That other peoples’ opinion of him is wrong? That his mother right all along?
See lessWhen he enrols in a strict prep school, a rebellious teen recruits a geek to help him graduate, which makes him a target for the geek’s bullies.
Beg to differ on subjective need in a logline, Can you give me an example of a critically acclaimed and/or successful movie that can be pitched only in terms of an invisible, internal need without a clue as to the *visible*, external action? "Wants the girl/boy" is an objective goal driven by subjecRead more
Beg to differ on subjective need in a logline, Can you give me an example of a critically acclaimed and/or successful movie that can be pitched only in terms of an invisible, internal need without a clue as to the *visible*, external action?
“Wants the girl/boy” is an objective goal driven by subjective needs. It promises to deliver a number of visual action scenes about a relationship– the meet cute, the first kiss, the breakup, the reconciliation, etc. It implies a visual last scene: either we *see* them on screen together as a happy couple. Or not.
“Wants to prove himself” is subjective, interior, hence invisible. It leaves a logline reader clueless as to the external *visual* action by which the character struggles to realize the invisible interior goal.
IMHO
See lessWhen he enrols in a strict prep school, a rebellious teen recruits a geek to help him graduate, which makes him a target for the geek’s bullies.
thedarkhorse, I'll give you points for persistence. This seems to be a story you not only want to tell, but that you MUST tell. Have you considered making the geek a girl? Out of desperation, he swallows his misplaced sense of pride to have her tutor him. She's only in it for the money -- she loatheRead more
thedarkhorse,
I’ll give you points for persistence. This seems to be a story you not only want to tell, but that you MUST tell.
Have you considered making the geek a girl? Out of desperation, he swallows his misplaced sense of pride to have her tutor him. She’s only in it for the money — she loathes about him. He needs the grades; she needs the money.
fwiw
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