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After falling for the tennis world champion, a no-name photographer gets a job at the Wimbledon tournament and pretends to be a successful newspaper owner to win her heart.
savinh0:FWIW: As an amateur photographer I am attracted to your premise.? However, I suggest that you invert the situation.? That is, he may be carrying a secret torch for her, but he's too shy, too socially inadequate to approach her directly.? However she notices and becomes interested in him viaRead more
savinh0:
FWIW: As an amateur photographer I am attracted to your premise.? However, I suggest that you invert the situation.? That is, he may be carrying a secret torch for her, but he’s too shy, too socially inadequate to approach her directly.? However she notices and becomes interested in him via his online photography,? his pictures of her in action.? And candid photos in between.
And other subjects.? You mentioned in one thread that he is agoraphobic, goes out at night.? Well, I follow on Flickr two photographers who specialize in night photography.? They do wonderful shots of the night life and scenes in the cities where they live.? (Which is not easy to do–night photography is challenging.) Their photography has attracted an avid following. So that’s another way she could become interested in him.? Her hobby is photography and she starts following him on Flickr or Instagram or Facebook.? And he notices she responds to his photos with “likes” and “faves”.? In this way you would be turning his liability in terms of? his personality into an asset in terms of the kind of photography he does as a compensation.
And then either she reaches to him with a comment or email query or he dares to reach to her to thank her for appreciation of his photos.
And then…
See lessRecovering from his suicide attempt, a famous techno artist regains his passion for music as he falls in love with a transsexual woman painter with internalized transphobia, for whom he will sacrifice his popularity for her to realize her worth.
Okay.? Stories that are anchored by and whose primary focus is a romantic relationship can have what amounts to dual protagonists.Now then.? You can expect a producer or director to expend 12-15 seconds of their precious time reading? a logline.? So? every word must matter, must make an impression.?Read more
Okay.? Stories that are anchored by and whose primary focus is a romantic relationship can have what amounts to dual protagonists.
Now then.? You can expect a producer or director to expend 12-15 seconds of their precious time reading? a logline.? So? every word must matter, must make an impression.? Brevity is not just a virtue, it’s a necessity.
The current version of this logline is 40 words in length.? Which , based upon my study of? 875 loglines (to date), is the upper limit for the length of an industry standard logline .? ?So? I would suggest pruning out the phrase about internalized transphobia because: 1]I don’t think it’s obvious what that means ( it certainly wasn’t to me).? A logline should be self-explanatory, a statement that can be immediately understood. 2] I think most people? apprehend intuitively that transsexuals endure formidable social and psychological challenges and conflicts.? Even those whose values are? not in sympathy? with the transsexual community.? (And if they aren’t in sympathy, they’re not going to respond favorably to your logline no matter how you word it, right?)
Finally, a logline is a statement of characters objective goal, not their subject needs.? Why? Because? film is a visual medium;? attaining an objective goals can be seen.? The objective goal of the USA women’s soccer team was to win the world cup. How do we know they succeeded?? Because we saw?them score points, saw them hoist the cup in victory.
So what’s the visual for “realize her worth”?? ?What does that look like?? What will an audience see on the screen that let’s them know they couple have succeeded?? What is their common objective goal? Or their commensurate goals?
fwiw
See lessRecovering from his suicide attempt, a famous techno artist regains his passion for music as he falls in love with a transsexual woman painter with internalized transphobia, for whom he will sacrifice his popularity for her to realize her worth.
Thanks for the clarification.Who is the protagonist, the main character, the pov /focus character for the story?? The artist or the painter?? IOW: who is in the driver's seat of the plot?
Thanks for the clarification.
Who is the protagonist, the main character, the pov /focus character for the story?? The artist or the painter?? IOW: who is in the driver’s seat of the plot?
See less