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  1. Posted: May 20, 2019In: Drama

    A quirky, slightly neurotic Seattle novelist becomes her own worst enemy when she falls in love with an inveterate ladies’ man.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 20, 2019 at 9:49 pm

    Agree with mikepedley85 that the logline sets up a situation for a plot and an inciting incident, but it doesn't follow through with a complete plot in terms of the character's objective goal.Further, a? description of a plot in a logline is about what a character intentionally wants to accomplish,Read more

    Agree with mikepedley85 that the logline sets up a situation for a plot and an inciting incident, but it doesn’t follow through with a complete plot in terms of the character’s objective goal.

    Further, a? description of a plot in a logline is about what a character intentionally wants to accomplish, not what a character unintentionally doesn’t want to happen like “becomes her own worst enemy”.

    I suggest reviewing the guidelines in “Our Formula” for writing an industry acceptable logline.

    ?

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  2. Posted: May 18, 2019In: Family

    ? A hypochondriac TV host on the brink of failure must confront his troubled past when the only way to save his show is to go on a road trip with his estranged biological sister to find their birth mother.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 20, 2019 at 5:34 am

    Bibi:Thanks for the further clarifications.Stripping (butchering?) the plot down to its spine, it seems to me that the guy's objective goal is to find his birth mother and persuade her to donate a kidney donor for his sister, something he can't bring himself to do because of his hypochondria.

    Bibi:
    Thanks for the further clarifications.

    Stripping (butchering?) the plot down to its spine, it seems to me that the guy’s objective goal is to find his birth mother and persuade her to donate a kidney donor for his sister, something he can’t bring himself to do because of his hypochondria.

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  3. Posted: May 18, 2019In: War

    An Army flight medic risks his own life day in and day out while desperately trying to save the lives of injured soldiers and civilians in Iraq.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 19, 2019 at 11:55 pm

    Okay, so "One week before the end of their tour [inciting incident], a medivac crew must..."Well, must what?? I'm guessing they're emotionally exhausted and hoping to glide through that last week and then go home, only to be assigned one last mission, that portends to be the most stressful and dangeRead more

    Okay, so “One week before the end of their tour [inciting incident], a medivac crew must…”

    Well, must what?? I’m guessing they’re emotionally exhausted and hoping to glide through that last week and then go home, only to be assigned one last mission, that portends to be the most stressful and dangerous of their tour.

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