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  1. Posted: May 22, 2019In: Examples

    When an army soldier befriends the very Indians he is commissioned to fight, he discovers for the first time, who he truly is.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 22, 2019 at 6:52 am

    "Discovering? who he truly is" relates to the character's subjective need; it is an unintended consequence of the action of the story.? However, loglines are not about unintended discoveries or subjective needs. Loglines are about objective wants,? about a protagonist's intentional actions to attainRead more

    “Discovering? who he truly is” relates to the character’s subjective need; it is an unintended consequence of the action of the story.? However, loglines are not about unintended discoveries or subjective needs. Loglines are about objective wants,? about a protagonist’s intentional actions to attain a specific goal.

    For your consideration: a discussion thread of “Dances with Wolves” from last year.

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  2. Posted: May 22, 2019In: Drama

    A true story, a man jailed twenty-six years for a crime his twin committed fights a choice: exact sweet revenge on his brother or forgive him to be fully and finally free.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 22, 2019 at 3:48 am

    First of all, I think you've got an great idea for a compelling story. Especially as it's based on the life of real twins. Truth is stranger than fiction -- and more interesting.However, loglines and plots are not about a choice a character has to make.? Rather, loglines and plots are about the initRead more

    First of all, I think you’ve got an great idea for a compelling story. Especially as it’s based on the life of real twins. Truth is stranger than fiction — and more interesting.

    However, loglines and plots are not about a choice a character has to make.? Rather, loglines and plots are about the initial choice a character makes that commits him to achieving an objective goal.? One that may eventually bring him to the dramatic crossroads entailed in your logline.

    So what is the dramatic choice the twin makes upon his release? (BTW: I assume that the story kicks into high gear, when the innocent twin finally gets out.) Well, if he chooses to forgive him at that point — fine. But that’s the end of the story. He’s resolved his dilemma. FADE OUT:… CREDIT ROLL

    So, I assume his initial dramatic choice upon being released is to seek sweet and sour revenge.? Hence, this as? a possible logline:

    Freed after 26 years for a crime he didn’t commit, a man sets out to get revenge on the man who did, his twin brother.
    (25 words)

    One question: What kind of revenge does he seek? To kill his twin? Or to prove his guilt so that the real criminal can go to jail?

    Whatever, the dramatic journey he takes may lead him to the climactic crossroads where he finally has the opportunity to exact revenge. Or not.

    That could be the moment of emotional and spiritual truth when he chooses to forgive.

    Finally, I suggest tagging it as biography rather than drama to designate that it’s based upon a real people , real events.

    Hope this helps.? This is a movie I would like to see. Best wishes with your writing.

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  3. Posted: May 20, 2019In: Thriller

    An entire town wakes up with dissociative amnesia and is told to be a part of a voluntary social experiment; when one member of the town begins to suspect they are being held against their will, he launches a secret investigation to rediscover his past.

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    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on May 20, 2019 at 11:18 pm

    What will rediscovering his past accomplish?? IOW:? what is his objective goal in terms of changing his present situation?

    What will rediscovering his past accomplish?? IOW:? what is his objective goal in terms of changing his present situation?

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