1. Posted: October 31, 2017In:

    When a famous tennis player have his wife murdered by a psychotic socialite he met on the train, he needs to prove his innocence in a crisscross murder he never agreed to.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity

    Yeah, moviefreak81, you picked a good one, a movie with "A" list screen credits:? a Patricia Highsmith story, no less,? adapted by Raymond Chandler, no less, directed by Alfred Hitchcock, no less. I? haven't seen the movie, only know of it by its reputation -- and IMDB summary.? That said, here's myRead more

    Yeah, moviefreak81, you picked a good one, a movie with “A” list screen credits:? a Patricia Highsmith story, no less,? adapted by Raymond Chandler, no less, directed by Alfred Hitchcock, no less.

    I? haven’t seen the movie, only know of it by its reputation — and IMDB summary.? That said, here’s my awkward, provisional take:

    After refusing a stranger’s offer to kill his hated wife in exchange for his killing the stranger’s hated father, a man must prove his innocence when the stranger fulfills his offer and kills his wife.
    (35 words)

    At 35 words, the logline borders on what I consider to be the red line for logline length.? As I mentioned, I have built up a database closing in on 800 loglines.? And I have (yet) to encounter a plot line I wasn’t able to formulate in 40 words or less.? From which I conclude that? 15 words or less is High Concept, 25 words or less is the ideal; 26 – 35 is acceptable;? 36-40 is tolerable — barely.? Anything over 40 words is too long.

    For your consideration, here is a chart of the distribution of word lengths that forms the basis for my own criteria:

    [img]https://loglines.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/Loglines781.jpg[/img]

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  2. Posted: October 31, 2017In:

    After the worst week of his adult life, a dispirited nice guy chooses guidance on becoming an alpha over suicide.

    dpg Singularity

    So:After losing his job, his wife, and a testicle in the same week, an underdog resolves to become a top dog.A top dog doing what?? What's his game plan, the specific means to his desired end?Losing the testicle is a good hook, an attention grabber that I suggest ought to be in the logline.? ?Now whRead more

    So:

    After losing his job, his wife, and a testicle in the same week, an underdog resolves to become a top dog.

    A top dog doing what?? What’s his game plan, the specific means to his desired end?

    Losing the testicle is a good hook, an attention grabber that I suggest ought to be in the logline.? ?Now what the logline needs to have is a? (brief) description of the specific course of action he decides to take to become a top dog.

    fwiw

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  3. Posted: October 31, 2017In:

    An established private investigator that unintentionally causes an international disaster by crashing a drone into a flying airliner must decide between turning himself in or covering his tracks and attempting to start a new life.

    dpg Singularity

    >>>must decide betweenLoglines are about plots.? Plots are about what characters do -- not decide whether or no to do, but what they actually do.So what does the PI do as a result of the of his careless behavior?? And why would an audience sympathize with and want to watch a film about a chRead more

    >>>must decide between

    Loglines are about plots.? Plots are about what characters do — not decide whether or no to do, but what they actually do.

    So what does the PI do as a result of the of his careless behavior?? And why would an audience sympathize with and want to watch a film about a character who runs away rather than man up?

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