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  1. Posted: November 1, 2017In: Drama

    After defying direct orders to abandon a helpess infant, a crack-shot sniper must embark on a dangerous journey to smuggle the baby across the border of a raging Civil War.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on November 2, 2017 at 3:46 am

    >>>a raging Civil War Where?? Africa, the Middle East, Latin America?? If this story setting is plausible, this might work.

    >>>a raging Civil War

    Where?? Africa, the Middle East, Latin America?? If this story setting is plausible, this might work.

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  2. Posted: October 31, 2017In: Examples

    When a famous tennis player have his wife murdered by a psychotic socialite he met on the train, he needs to prove his innocence in a crisscross murder he never agreed to.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on November 2, 2017 at 12:10 am

    Foxtrot25:>>>wouldn?t writers need a bit more space to accurately convey these larger pitches?Perhaps. But because of the multiplication of media platforms and production options,? everything I read suggests that the competition for attention, quality eye time, is fiercer than ever.? Imho,Read more

    Foxtrot25:

    >>>wouldn?t writers need a bit more space to accurately convey these larger pitches?

    Perhaps. But because of the multiplication of media platforms and production options,? everything I read suggests that the competition for attention, quality eye time, is fiercer than ever.? Imho, the best strategy for an unrepresented writer to pitch a more complex story line is to first get an agent and make a sale for a simpler one.

    Moviefreak 81:

    My advice is to roll your own.? It’s the best way to learn.? My original objective goal was to prove the hypothetical, that the ideal logline length is 25 words or less. In the process, I discovered mountains beyond the original mountain I assayed to climb,? insights into plotting scripts in general.

    regards.

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  3. Posted: November 1, 2017In: Thriller

    A smart sophisticated business woman comes across a document that ends up pushing her to a limit beyond her control.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on November 1, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    As others have noted.? The logline is vague and presents her as a passive, reactive victim of the document.? Protagonist's are supposed to be proactive not reactive. The document contains a discovery.? The discovery constitutes the inciting incident. That needs to be stated with greater specificity.Read more

    As others have noted.? The logline is vague and presents her as a passive, reactive victim of the document.? Protagonist’s are supposed to be proactive not reactive.

    The document contains a discovery.? The discovery constitutes the inciting incident. That needs to be stated with greater specificity.

    As a result of this discovery, she must do something.? What must she do?? What becomes her objective goal?

    I suggest you consult “Formula” at the top of the web page for guidelines on writing an industry standard logline.

    fwiw

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