1. Posted: October 19, 2017In:

    A young aid worker learns humanity has been manipulated for aeons. He must learn control time to save humanity and the people he loves.

    dpg Singularity

    Manipulated how? To what end? And so what?? IOW: what's at stake?

    Manipulated how? To what end?

    And so what?? IOW: what’s at stake?

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  2. Posted: October 18, 2017In:

    When a passionate biker girl’s entry to participate in a Motorcycle trip was denied on basis of her gender : She refuses to put off this apparent set back- and holding firm to the credo, embarks on a most chaotic and hilarious journey of her life ,Solo monumental motorcycle odyssey from American West coast to East coast to create history in the “Motorcycle Hall of Fame”.

    dpg Singularity

    As Foxtrot25 said.? At 66 words in length too long and convoluted to evaluate as a logline.I think there is the seed for an interesting America Odyssey story here with a female protagonist (for a change). So I want to -- but I am not (yet) enticed -- to ride along on this one.My concern is the crediRead more

    As Foxtrot25 said.? At 66 words in length too long and convoluted to evaluate as a logline.

    I think there is the seed for an interesting America Odyssey story here with a female protagonist (for a change). So I want to — but I am not (yet) enticed — to ride along on this one.

    My concern is the credibility of the inciting incident that kick starts the story.? While there remain bumps, grease slicks, ruts and speed traps of male chauvinism among bikers, I am not aware that the gender issue is generally an insurmountable obstacle to riding with a pack that it once was.? As any attendee or spectator at the Rolling Thunder and Sturgis rallies can attest. What is the time period for this story?

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  3. Posted: October 16, 2017In:

    When two inmates realise that no one is on their side, together they must navigate an uneasy friendship to set each other free.

    dpg Singularity

    I sense this has the makings of an Odd Couple-Buddy film.? ?However:>>>realise that no one is on their sideThat's hardly headline news, a shocking basis for an inciting incident. Prisons are a Hobbesian hell of all against all and every man for himself.Nor does that tell us how that translaRead more

    I sense this has the makings of an Odd Couple-Buddy film.? ?However:

    >>>realise that no one is on their side

    That’s hardly headline news, a shocking basis for an inciting incident. Prisons are a Hobbesian hell of all against all and every man for himself.

    Nor does that tell us how that translates into the specific and imminent danger they face they band together to escape.? I guess they’re about to be killed.? But I shouldn’t have to guess.? The logline should say so.

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