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  1. Posted: April 9, 2017In: Biography

    MAKING WHOOPI – The unbelievable true and moving triumph of the human spirit story of how Caryn Elaine Johnson’s powerful relationship with her mother helped her survive the welfare system in 1950’s Manhattan, drug addiction, and a self inflicted abortion to reinvent herself into a world- reknowned Academy Award winning actress.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on April 9, 2017 at 10:34 pm

    >>>Caryn Elaine Johnson?sAka: Whoopi Goldberg. ?So that's the name to use in the logline as well as the title.Good title, but, Ms. Goldberg controls all the rights to her life story, so I don't see the point of taking the time to polish this logline unless you've got a contract to script aRead more

    >>>Caryn Elaine Johnson?s

    Aka: Whoopi Goldberg. ?So that’s the name to use in the logline as well as the title.

    Good title, but, Ms. Goldberg controls all the rights to her life story, so I don’t see the point of taking the time to polish this logline unless you’ve got a contract to script a story on her life.

    Just staying.

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  2. Posted: April 3, 2017In: Noir

    When her male colleagues wager on her best friend’s chastity, a woman remains silent; when the bet ends in rape, she seeks redemption through vengeance.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on April 9, 2017 at 3:35 am

    >>>she seeks to drive him suicidally insane.?Why doesn't she just plot his death?OR: what is the emotional truth in the moment after the rapist beats the rap? ?What is the emotional truth in the heart of the protagonist?What is the emotional truth in the heart of the audience as they witnesRead more

    >>>she seeks to drive him suicidally insane.?

    Why doesn’t she just plot his death?

    OR: what is the emotional truth in the moment after the rapist beats the rap? ?What is the emotional truth in the heart of the protagonist?

    What is the emotional truth in the heart of the audience as they witness such an outrageous injustice?

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  3. Posted: April 8, 2017In: SciFi

    When an LA homicide detective uncovers a corporate conspiracy to use clones as assassins and is framed for murder, she must track down her own duplicate to prove her innocence.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on April 9, 2017 at 2:56 am

    Nice rewrite, yqwertz. ?It is concise and establishes ?why the syndicate is framing the detective. ?That facilitates my buying into the story.Yes, the syndicate is made up of many so who is the principal antagonist? It doesn't matter. It's a mystery genre film so it does not need to be revealed -- sRead more

    Nice rewrite, yqwertz. ?It is concise and establishes ?why the syndicate is framing the detective. ?That facilitates my buying into the story.

    Yes, the syndicate is made up of many so who is the principal antagonist? It doesn’t matter. It’s a mystery genre film so it does not need to be revealed — should not be revealed — in a logline. ?It’s part of the mystery to be solved , to find out who is running the syndicate. ?Who really wants her discredited and removed?

    Just as in “Chinatown”. ?Gittes initially thinks he’s going up against unidentified “bad guys” — a corporate cabal — ?who are out to control the water supply. ?Not until the last Act comes the Big Reveal, that’s he up against just?one bad guy.

    My slight tweak (to have a 2nd beat on the word “clone”, the hook):

    After a detective uncovers a syndicate using clones as assassins, she is framed for murder and must find her clone to prove her innocence.
    (24 words, 137 characters — Twitter friendly)

    fwiw

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