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Two career tramps, a yachtsman and an ex-actress, falling in love team up and live swindling the jet set ? but they risk losing it all when yachtsman?s ex-wife comes undercover for an IRS sting
The con couple may love each other -- but why should we in the audience love them for their crimes and deceptions? ? Why should we want them to evade the law?Also, within the framework of the story, the protagonists are supposed to be proactive. ?But within the framework of this story, the con charaRead more
The con couple may love each other — but why should we in the audience love them for their crimes and deceptions? ? Why should we want them to evade the law?
Also, within the framework of the story, the protagonists are supposed to be proactive. ?But within the framework of this story, the con characters are reactive — they’re playing defense. ?
They are characters in the ex-lover’s plot. ?She, at least, does have a specific objective goal: to catch and convict her ex-husband and his lover.
There it is, her objective goal, ?in 9 words.
If you strip out the embellishments, all the other logline elements, ?what, in one ?short sentence is his objective goal?
What is his?plot all about? ?(“Risk losing it all” is about his jeopardy — not his objective goal.)
See lessPERTH GIRLS ARE EASY – When a space alien is chosen by his people to go to where the beautiful humans are (LA) and mate with one, he miscalculates and lands in remote Perth, Australia. Now armed only with pop culture references and bourgie lines like “I’m a producer”, he must find and convince a down to earth Aussie girl to have a baby with him or he’ll return home alone and be executed.
Unfortunately, at 68 words in length this is more akin to an elevator pitch than a logline.
Unfortunately, at 68 words in length this is more akin to an elevator pitch than a logline.
See lessAstrolia: When a man goes missing on an archaeological dig his brilliant but narrow-minded niece discovers his secret double life and her own connection to an ancient prophecy in a world she never knew existed.
>>If this were for a movie I would agree, however this is for a series and covers the main arc for the first season.Okay, but ?the logline should indicate the initial objective goal of the protagonist. ?And a pursuit of that objective goal that boots up in the pilot episode.For example, afterRead more
>>If this were for a movie I would agree, however this is for a series and covers the main arc for the first season.
Okay, but ?the logline should indicate the initial objective goal of the protagonist. ?And a pursuit of that objective goal that boots up in the pilot episode.
For example, after he is diagnosed with a fatal cancer, Walter White’s objective goal is to earn enough money by cooking crystal to provide for his family after his death. ?That’s the story hook planted in the pilot episode.
And then complications ensue.
IOW: ?the overall arc of the 1st season is not a matter of the plot drift, the character being carried along by events. ?Rather, The arc of the 1st season is character driven, which is to say it is determined by the objective goal she decides to pursue.
I’m guessing your current logline contains the ?end of season one Big Discovery– her own prophetic destiny. Which I presume that you intend to be the story hook for selling the series. ?Well, her prophetic destiny is vague; ?it could be any one of ?1,001 items on a plot menu. ?Which is ?one is it that differentiates it from all the other plot possibilities?
Also, what producers are looking for in a logline is a concept that hooks the audience in the pilot episode, not a Big Reveal that comes at the end of ?the 1st season. ?
So ?what’s the hook in the pilot episode?
What must she do when her uncle disappears? ?The operative word is “must”. ?It can’t be something she casually pursues or accidentally stumbles into. ? In the pilot episode she MUST begin to pursue an objective goal. ?That an audience must tune in episode after episode to see what happens next.
fwiw
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