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?When a man realizes the creatures, he?s been convinced his whole life weren?t real, are actually trying to take over the world, will he turn against what end up being his own kind, or save his new love, and the rest of the human race?? ? UNKNOWN POWER by Judah Ray ?
Visions about what? What makes his visions special, of dramatic interest that they trigger dramatic action?"Define the human race" ????? ?What does that mean? ?What's the visual moment on that? ?Film is a visual medium and objective goals have to have a ?visual correlate that cues the audience thatRead more
Visions about what? What makes his visions special, of dramatic interest that they trigger dramatic action?
“Define the human race” ?
???? ?
What does that mean? ?What’s the visual moment on that? ?Film is a visual medium and objective goals have to have a ?visual correlate that cues the audience that the protagonist has achieved ?(or fallen short) of his objective goal.
Example: ?a sprinter’s objective goal is to win Olympic gold. ?The visual moment on that is: If he breaks the tape at the Olympic games he succeeds. ?If a competitor breaks the tape, he fails.
Again what is the visual for “defining the human race”? ?What does that moment LOOK like on a movie screen?
Re the revision:
Loglines imply a dramatic question but don’t explicitly raise the question. ?Again the example of the sprinter: ?his objective goal implicitly raises the question: ?will he succeed? ?But the logline would not be written in the form of a question.
So, the protagonist comes to realize he’s not imagining an invading species and that they are his kind. ?But he’s got good vibes about humanity. ?So: what becomes his objective goal in the context of his predicament? ?What must he do to save homo sapiens sapiens from his own species?
See lessA victim of inner turmoil, twenty-year-old Stephanie disastrously endeavors to reclaim her joy and happiness.
"Stephanie": ?As a rule, fictional characters are not identified by name. ?Rather they are identified by a defining characteristic, a strength or vulnerability that is relevant to the protagonist's objective goal. "Inner turmoil" -- what's the visual? Film is visual medium and every word relating toRead more
“Stephanie”: ?As a rule, fictional characters are not identified by name. ?Rather they are identified by a defining characteristic, a strength or vulnerability that is relevant to the protagonist’s objective goal.
“Inner turmoil” — what’s the visual? Film is visual medium and every word relating to conflict should be about external activity that can be shown on the screen.
“Disastrously endeavors to reclaim her joy and happiness.” Again, what’s the visual? Loglines are striving for objective goals, not fulfilling subjective wants or achieving desired states of mind. ?(Which in any case, are the consequence of reaching an objective goal.)
What is her objective goal?
Who or what opposes her?
What’s at stake?
You might want to check out “formula” at the top of the web page for guidelines on writing an industry standard logline.
See less?When the mellow, aging owner of a medicinal marijuana dispensary leaves his wayward son in charge of the shop, on the very day cops and criminals turn the place into a madhouse, will he side with the man who has acted like his father, or his actual blood?? ? POT SHOP by Judah Ray ?
What's the inciting incident that creates the "madhouse"? What becomes the son's objective goal as a result of the inciting incident? What's at stake?
What’s the inciting incident that creates the “madhouse”?
See lessWhat becomes the son’s objective goal as a result of the inciting incident?
What’s at stake?