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  1. Posted: November 1, 2016In: Comedy

    A deranged lonely programmer must run away from a sadistic motorbiker, as he kills his cheating girlfriend after consulting his multiple topsy-turvy personalities.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on November 1, 2016 at 12:55 am

    He actually kills his girlfriend -- and?that's supposed to be funny??I am intrigued by a story of a protagonist afflicted with MPD (multiple personality disorder), but I think the suggested logline Richiev posed under version 1.0? is better and worth considering as a starting point.You also indicateRead more

    He actually kills his girlfriend — and?that’s supposed to be funny??

    I am intrigued by a story of a protagonist afflicted with MPD (multiple personality disorder), but I think the suggested logline Richiev posed under version 1.0? is better and worth considering as a starting point.

    You also indicated that you were thinking of the concept in terms of a short film. ?However, I think it has the potential to be expanded into a feature length film — although I think that would require rethinking the inciting incident.

    However, it’s your story.

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  2. Posted: October 29, 2016In: SciFi

    An overconfident successful engineer creates a machine to venture inside a dying notorious murderer?s brain and walk in it like virtual reality, only to find himself lost in the man?s enigmatic mind, while he must escape before the man takes over his mind and body

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on October 30, 2016 at 7:39 am

    Of all the minds that the engineer could choose to explore with his techno-toy, why does he choose to explore the mind of a murderer? ?What's ?the psychological hook that motivates his choice? (The latent character flaw as opposed to the manifest one, "overconfidence"?)

    Of all the minds that the engineer could choose to explore with his techno-toy, why does he choose to explore the mind of a murderer? ?What’s ?the psychological hook that motivates his choice? (The latent character flaw as opposed to the manifest one, “overconfidence”?)

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  3. Posted: October 29, 2016In: Comedy

    A vengeful lonely guy consults to his multiple psychopathic personalities, who all either support him, frustrate him or simply do random stuff, while he is deciding whether he should kill his cheating girlfriend or forgive her.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on October 30, 2016 at 4:24 am

    What do you conceive as your story hook?And who, among the diverse personalities within his skull, gets tagged as the protagonist? ?And what does he want? ?What is his overarching objective goal?The reason I ask is that it seems to me that if you're intention is to write a feature length film, the ?Read more

    What do you conceive as your story hook?

    And who, among the diverse personalities within his skull, gets tagged as the protagonist? ?And what does he want? ?What is his overarching objective goal?

    The reason I ask is that it seems to me that if you’re intention is to write a feature length film, the ?inciting incident that kicks off the plot would occur earlier than his discovery that his girlfriend is cheating; that is, the discovery of the cheating would trigger the major crisis ?that builds to the climax of the plot. ? And the plot crisis leading to the plot climax is not the same as the dramatic problem and question triggered by the inciting incident.

    fwiw

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