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A newly engaged woman realizes she spent all her childhood searching for love and no time making friends. Determined to ?have it all?, she sets out to find friends and discovers it?s much harder now as an adult.
One screenwriting guru divides stories into "masculine mode" and "feminine mode". ?"Masculine mode" stories are about a protagonist (male or female) striving to achieve an objective goal. ?"Feminine mode" stories are about a protagonist (female more likely, but male, too) seeking to build or repairRead more
One screenwriting guru divides stories into “masculine mode” and “feminine mode”. ?”Masculine mode” stories are about a protagonist (male or female) striving to achieve an objective goal. ?”Feminine mode” stories are about a protagonist (female more likely, but male, too) seeking to build or repair a relationship, romantic or otherwise.
Putting aside the issue of ?sexist stereotyping for the ?moment, this seems to be a distinctly “feminine mode” story, a story that focuses on relationship problems. ?Consequently, describing this story in the format of a logline entails a general challenge as well as a particular problem.
The general challenge is that logline formula is better suited to describing “masculine mode” stories because that’s the mode of most movies (even with a female protagonist.) ?The industry standard ?logline formula describes a protagonist pursuing an objective goal against an antagonist and sundry obstacles. ?Relationship issues may be an important part of the story as a whole, but they are extraneous to a logline.
IOW: ?the standard logline formula was not designed to describe relationship stories.
The particular problem with this logline is that it lacks specificity, details that make it stand out from all the other stories about a protagonist?who?has been looking for romantic love and needs non-romantic friendship.
For instance, whether the story is “masculine” or “feminine” mode, it should be triggered by an inciting incident. ?And that inciting incident needs to be part of the logline. ?However, this logline is unclear as to what the specific incident is that triggers the character’s realization and reorientation of her action.
Is the inciting incident the engagement, the pending marriage? ?And if so, why would it trigger her realization? ?Does she discover she has no female friends to be bride maids? ?Even though that’s a female version of the groom’s predicament in “I love You, Man” and “The Wedding Ringer”, there may be a good comedy in it because it goes against the stereotype, that women are better at friendships than men.
And in both of those best man movies, the plot is actually a combination of “female” and “male” modes: ?the guys need to find authentic male friendship (solve a relationship problem) in order to achieve an objective goal (have a best man to stand by them on the wedding day).
For lack of sufficient details, that is my general suggestion m.o. for constructing a logline for your story.
fwiw
See lessAfter deciding they are together for the long haul, recent college graduates and lovers, Wyatt and Emma, have their relationship tested as they move across the country for a job that doesn’t actually exist.
What Richiev said. And characters need not be named in fictional stories. ?More important is their defining characteristic (strength or weakness). And what's the source of dramatic tension that tests their relationship? ?Because one character is reluctantly sacrificing a job opportunity or preferredRead more
What Richiev said. And characters need not be named in fictional stories. ?More important is their defining characteristic (strength or weakness).
And what’s the source of dramatic tension that tests their relationship? ?Because one character is reluctantly sacrificing a job opportunity or preferred living location for the sake of the other? ?Whatever, it needs to be indicated.
See lessWhen their two best friends suddenly die, an adventurous wife and risk-averse husband discover in the will that they must scatter the ashes in a remote Italian village, propelling them on a European road trip that will challenge their relationship.
>>lose the ?European?I ?respectfully disagree. ?Don't lose "European". ?Where the road trip is set?makes a big difference in selling the script, financing the film. ?Location, in this case, sets up certain expectations for adventures and misadventures. ?Which will be radically different for aRead more
>>lose the ?European?
I ?respectfully disagree. ?Don’t lose “European”. ?Where the road trip is set?makes a big difference in selling the script, financing the film. ?Location, in this case, sets up certain expectations for adventures and misadventures. ?Which will be radically different for a road trip to scatter ashes in the Alps compared to a road trip to scatter ashes in the shadow of Ayers Rock.
I do agree it needs tidying up, but as the project has been re-classified as a comedy, ?and it’s 2 people who have died now (why two?), I am confused as to what the author’s intentions are.?
?fwiw
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