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  1. Posted: August 11, 2016In: Crime

    When a high school kid suspects his father is responsible for a series of grisly prostitute murders, he teams up with a plucky young call girl to positively identify and stop the murderer.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 11, 2016 at 1:12 pm

    Yes, why not just go to the police? ?Why does he take all the police work (investigation and apprehension) upon himself?

    Yes, why not just go to the police? ?Why does he take all the police work (investigation and apprehension) upon himself?

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  2. Posted: August 9, 2016In: Thriller

    When a hyper-sexualised girl band becomes trapped by a psychopathic religious woman, a pop singer must kill her band and manipulate her captor to escape.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 11, 2016 at 1:54 am

    Since the religious woman is the prime mover, the one who boots up the story by taking the band hostage, yes, find out what the religious woman wants -- the "why?" ? There ought ?to be a ?"why" otherwise the conflict and suffering is essentially meaningless, gratuitous. ?The audience doesn't have toRead more

    Since the religious woman is the prime mover, the one who boots up the story by taking the band hostage, yes, find out what the religious woman wants — the “why?” ? There ought ?to be a ?”why” otherwise the conflict and suffering is essentially meaningless, gratuitous. ?The audience doesn’t have to agree with the “why”, just accept it as credible.

    Which is another way of asking: what is the core value or idea you wish to explore in this story? ?What’s your dramatic point? ?Devoutly religious people find wanton sexual behavior sinful. ?Why does this one over react, go beyond mere moral revulsion?

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  3. Posted: August 10, 2016In: Family

    Revised Logline…A young, bot obsessed girl, from an Australian/ Muslim family is a finalist for a Robotics Competition, but when her volatile, dysfunctional family smash her robot, she must rebuild it and her family to compete in a game that will put her to the ultimate test.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 10, 2016 at 7:17 am

    >>Building the robot should be the goalBuilding the robot is a?means to the desired end, an indispensable step to the objective goal. ?Her Biggest Dream is not to build a robot but to get a university education..For that she needs to win the scholarship-- her family is too poor to pay her way.Read more

    >>Building the robot should be the goal

    Building the robot is a?means to the desired end, an indispensable step to the objective goal. ?Her Biggest Dream is not to build a robot but to get a university education..

    For that she needs to win the scholarship– her family is too poor to pay her way.

    To win the scholarship she needs to ?win the contest.

    To win the contest she needs to build the robot.

    Objective goals are about going for the Biggest Dream.

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