Have an account? Sign In Now
Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
After growing up destitute, a young woman must decide between love and mediocrity, or dispassionate opulence.
Hey Naven,An inciting incident appears to be missing.?What major event happens that makes the MC have to decide between love and mediocrity? If you answer that, a clear antagonist should come naturally, too.
Hey Naven,
An inciting incident appears to be missing.?What major event happens that makes the MC have to decide between love and mediocrity? If you answer that, a clear antagonist should come naturally, too.
See lessA local message carrier, mid 20’s, travels to an island to tell a woman villager her mother died in the city. But something made him keep the news to himself, and begged never to return again.
"A local message carrier, mid 20?s, travels to an island to tell a woman villager her mother died in the city. But something made him keep the news to himself, and begged never to return again." Hey? anjudevera, So, when this local message carrier travels to an island to break some bad news to a womRead more
“A local message carrier, mid 20?s, travels to an island to tell a woman villager her mother died in the city. But something made him keep the news to himself, and begged never to return again.”
Hey? anjudevera,
So, when this local message carrier travels to an island to break some bad news to a woman villager,?what?exactly makes him keep the news to himself? To me, the way the logline is presented, this “something” seems too important for it to not have any clarity. But, if it is a third act spoiler, shift focus on him ultimately keeping the news to himself in a alternate version of this logline and simply clarify his motivation/goal for that decision.
See lessAn elderly man, lost in a giant maze is transformed into his younger self; but when he discovers his new world is also a slave trade; he must find the Maze Master who holds the key to freedom for all.
"An elderly man, lost in a giant maze is transformed into his younger self; but when he discovers his new world is also a slave trade; he must find the Maze Master who holds the key to freedom for all." Hey GStar, you may want to consider omitting?...is transformed into his younger self just from thRead more
“An elderly man, lost in a giant maze is transformed into his younger self; but when he discovers his new world is also a slave trade; he must find the Maze Master who holds the key to freedom for all.”
Hey GStar, you may want to consider omitting?…is transformed into his younger self just from the logline. Because, while it may be a key point in your story, it doesn’t compliment?the story you present in the logline – which is about an elderly man who discovers his new world is a slave trade ( or port? ).
See less