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250 Years into the future, the US and others have shied more and more from democracy. A Young Man working for NASA is chosen to be part of a team mission to explore a new planet found far away that could potentially be a new home for humans, away from corrupt governments and war. The discoveries he and his team make will change them forever.
It can begin with something like... Fleeing from tyranny, a spacecraft sets forth to colonize a nearby planet that will promise to be free of government control. Upon arrival, they find... Now you still need to include something about what awaits them and what they must overcome to make their dreamRead more
It can begin with something like…
Fleeing from tyranny, a spacecraft sets forth to colonize a nearby planet that will promise to be free of government control. Upon arrival, they find…
Now you still need to include something about what awaits them and what they must overcome to make their dream a reality before something bad happens to them.
See lessUpdated: When an Eskimo grandmother is abandoned by her migrating family during a famine, she struggles to survive through a bitter winter until?the ?spring ?thaw.
After being abandoned by her family, an Eskimo grandmother must survive the famine of a bitter winter until spring arrives. The problem with this is the generic "survival only." While I'm sure you can make a movie of her struggles, it really is only "surviving" unless you have a phenomenal series ofRead more
After being abandoned by her family, an Eskimo grandmother must survive the famine of a bitter winter until spring arrives.
The problem with this is the generic “survival only.” While I’m sure you can make a movie of her struggles, it really is only “surviving” unless you have a phenomenal series of hurdles for granny to overcome, what else does she really have to do? If she wasn’t intentionally abandoned and only lost, then I can see her survival to get back to her family as a great feel good goal.
Otherwise, how does this play out?
Does granny make it through the winter only to still have her family not want her? That’s not very fulfilling. What other big goal does she have to survive for? Is there anything we can include in the log?
See lessA selfish billionaire businessman went to NYC were he got kidnapped by his opponents, and left to die in a small old room.
Take a look at the wonderful resources for writing loglines that this site has to offer. Yours is written in past tense and doesn't work to generate a hook. Write what must be done, why and what will not be achieved or lost if such act is not done.
Take a look at the wonderful resources for writing loglines that this site has to offer.
Yours is written in past tense and doesn’t work to generate a hook. Write what must be done, why and what will not be achieved or lost if such act is not done.
See less