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As a wildfire advances, an inexperienced deputy sheriff must evacuate his town and protect it from looters.
As a logline this is pretty good. I can see the concept. It does need an antagonist though, in addition to "the fire". In it's current form it sounds like an episode of Mayberry RFD, with Barney Fife as the MC,
As a logline this is pretty good. I can see the concept. It does need an antagonist though, in addition to “the fire”.
In it’s current form it sounds like an episode of Mayberry RFD, with Barney Fife as the MC,
See lessTo salvage her disgraced career, an L.A. Chef goes to work for a Kdrama star whose temper is as challenging as the cuisine.
So it seems that the Kdrama celebrity is the antagonist. But the plot is vaguely stated. (happens in over 50% of the posted loglines on this site -- so you are not alone). Maybe try something like the following: have the Kdrama star host an LA exclusive culinary event in which all of the top LA chefRead more
So it seems that the Kdrama celebrity is the antagonist. But the plot is vaguely stated. (happens in over 50% of the posted loglines on this site — so you are not alone).
Maybe try something like the following: have the Kdrama star host an LA exclusive culinary event in which all of the top LA chefs will attend (including former employers of the MC). Now the difficult Kdrama celebrity, with poor food ideas, is standing between the MC and his/her redemption.
Or something along those lines.
Hope: MC wins acclaim and redeems career,
vs.
Fear: following the bimbo celebrity’s bad food ideas will result in culinary humiliation and flopdom in LA.
Kick-it up a notch: Food Network will televise the event so flopdom extends to the entire country!
See lessIn the claustrophobia of a haunted flat, an immature voodoo sorcerer makes a terrible choice when he calls upon his dark gods to seek revenge for a broken heart.
You are hiding the ball by describing your second act as a "terrible choice". This vague description encompasses the main plot and your entire second act, one half of the story (one hour for a movie). "Gee Bob, let's go see a movie tonight. How about a cool movie where the sorcerer makes a terribleRead more
You are hiding the ball by describing your second act as a “terrible choice”. This vague description encompasses the main plot and your entire second act, one half of the story (one hour for a movie).
“Gee Bob, let’s go see a movie tonight. How about a cool movie where the sorcerer makes a terrible choice.”
Please give us more than a vague reference to your main conflict.
Loglines are a great tool to keep you focused on the big picture. What you described is a vague idea.
If you know what you are writing, state it.
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