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A retired father and his daughter must forgive previous tensions to work together to prevent his other daughters from selling the family business.
Might need to add a B story here, like some important reason for not selling the bar. I mean, imagine if they took out the discovery of the treasure map from The Goonies... that's kind of what you have here at the moment.
Might need to add a B story here, like some important reason for not selling the bar.
I mean, imagine if they took out the discovery of the treasure map from The Goonies… that’s kind of what you have here at the moment.
See lessTo solve the puzzle of her family disappearance, a fraud investigator must find out the truth about her father who masterminded an international criminal heist
I don't know if anybody has said this, but the biggest 'elephant' in your logline is your insistence in including the location. Take it out, it's not important to the story at all. And stretching it out to 'fit together the pieces blah blah blah' just say 'solve the puzzle', there is no Oscar categoRead more
I don’t know if anybody has said this, but the biggest ‘elephant’ in your logline is your insistence in including the location. Take it out, it’s not important to the story at all.
And stretching it out to ‘fit together the pieces blah blah blah’ just say ‘solve the puzzle’, there is no Oscar category for best convolution in a logline.
‘To find out the truth about her father, a fraud investigator must solve the puzzle behind an international criminal heist’ or some such.
More thriller, less filler…
See lessTo solve the puzzle of her family disappearance, a fraud investigator must find out the truth about her father who masterminded an international criminal heist
I don't know if anybody has said this, but the biggest 'elephant' in your logline is your insistence in including the location. Take it out, it's not important to the story at all. And stretching it out to 'fit together the pieces blah blah blah' just say 'solve the puzzle', there is no Oscar categoRead more
I don’t know if anybody has said this, but the biggest ‘elephant’ in your logline is your insistence in including the location. Take it out, it’s not important to the story at all.
And stretching it out to ‘fit together the pieces blah blah blah’ just say ‘solve the puzzle’, there is no Oscar category for best convolution in a logline.
‘To find out the truth about her father, a fr
See less