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After the world’s military is wiped out by an advanced inter-dimensional civilisation, a group of mis-fit ex-marines must put their differences aside and work together to save humanity from their alien overlords.
What does save humanity mean? Is there a specific objective you can describe to crystalise their efforts around? Save the world is such a trope. A description of specific objectives could help the reader understand what will happen, and if it is orignial, help with the whole tropey thing. For examplRead more
What does save humanity mean? Is there a specific objective you can describe to crystalise their efforts around?
Save the world is such a trope. A description of specific objectives could help the reader understand what will happen, and if it is orignial, help with the whole tropey thing.
For example, they could need to blow up the mother ship, or destroy the alien hive mind, or kill the alien general – all these options are cliches, of course, but if you can think of an original objective it would help make this stand out from the – oh so many – aliens attack earth stories already out there.
Secondly, about the logline you can replace the first clause with After a superior alien race takes over Earth. You should also shift the focus of the plot from these characters trying to “get along” to what the F they do about the alien problem, in other words, focus on the greater stakes at hand – saving the world.
Last thing, best to specify the main character instead of a group. I keep finding less experienced writers trying to write multi protagonist plots, but they are ever so much harder to pull off successfully than single protagonist plots,? and single protagonist plots are hard enough already.
See lessAfter a police station is attacked, a supernatural mercenary in custody must work with mundane cops to defend it from a group of faeries seeking the powerful artifact she stole.
I think your structure is flawed. A whole act dedicated to a single interrogation will not work. Some of the best writers and directors in the industry would struggle to make a single interrogation scene interesting much less a whole act. Secondly, you keep referencing The Terminator for the fight,Read more
I think your structure is flawed. A whole act dedicated to a single interrogation will not work. Some of the best writers and directors in the industry would struggle to make a single interrogation scene interesting much less a whole act.
Secondly, you keep referencing The Terminator for the fight, but to remind you the police station attack in the first Terminator movie was one (albeit long and elaborate) scene, not all of act 2. I strongly suggest you re think the structure of your plot.
Lastly, shifting dramatic points of view is very risky, as you are planning on breaking the flow of the plot for the audience each time you cut away from one character to the other. Best to write the story from a single dramatic point of view – either inside the police station or outside of it.
See lessAfter witnessing his grandfather’s murder, a New Mexico high school senior has a nervous breakdown and travels to Taos to remake his life – assuming false personas that are inspired by magazines he collects – while being pursued by his grandfather’s killer, who he discovers is one of his best friends.
Too wordy and unclear. Focus on the goal and action. To that matter, what specifically is his goal? If the inciting incident, or his motivating event, is the killing, shouldn't his goal be to kill the bad guy or have him incarcerated?? Running away, fake identites, new life, etc... pales in comparisRead more
Too wordy and unclear.
Focus on the goal and action. To that matter, what specifically is his goal?
If the inciting incident, or his motivating event, is the killing, shouldn’t his goal be to kill the bad guy or have him incarcerated?? Running away, fake identites, new life, etc… pales in comparison.
See less