Thanks all for feedback. Indeed we are ‘prosecuting’ the idea! The project is in development, see http://www.JobsForWomenfilm.com

A little background – it’s a true story, that began in 1980 in Wollongong, Australia, where women were outright refused jobs by BHP, a mega company which was the richest corporation in Australia at that point. In Wollongong BHP employed 20,000 people (96% men, the women could work in the canteen or as secretaries), and the steelworks and the mines provided over 80% of the jobs…so if women couldn’t get jobs there, they were basically stuffed. Wollongong was/is a very working class city, with a fairly strong union history and tight knit community.

In terms of other feedback:

– ‘too detailed’ – agree, but what to cut, when actually others asked for more detail (country, culture). But perhaps cutback/refine the obstacles? (see attempted rework below)

– ‘specific woman’ vs ‘group’ – I appreciate that loglines generally should have an identifiable protoganist, yet the reality of this story, and in some ways its beauty and strength, is the *collective nature* of the struggle. There were 4 key leaders that the film intends focusing on – a very young radical woman approx 20; a more experienced fighter approx 30, and 2 migrant women (one from Eastern Europe, one from South America) who were key to the campaign. But it’s hard to pick out one for the logline…..suggestions welcome!

– ‘exact obstacle’ – well they were *all* obstacles (and then some!), and in some ways it was the fact they overcame so many hurdles that makes the story worth telling….but yes, I probably need to at least get that across in a less wordy way.

How about this rework:
“When women are refused jobs at Wollongong’s largest company, four ordinary women from different worlds must unite to lead a community battle from the factory gates to the highest courts to win equality.”