The interesting thing about this site (as opposed to keeping the logline to yourself) is whenever I defend my idea or get that friction – I end up developing it more and colouring it in. The friction is good for your idea.

I would focus on the couple at the heart of it ? the playboy and the married woman.

Exactly right. It should just be those two really. The one thing that turns me off about the whole concept – it is very European, arty… and sadly unmarketable. Unless I can “smuggle” all these ideas in to something else. We’ll see.

IMO, both the libertine and the monogamous lifestyles have elements of prison and freedom. Rather than play one angle, I?d play with showing how each lifestyle has both elements? Maybe it could be a ?the grass is always greener? cautionary tale.

Very very good idea.

I’ll play with the logline and see if I can add a twist/hook.

Thank you for your thoughts.

I finished writing a first draft for this and haven’t quite let it cool off – so go easy on me ha.

Now – I pitched it on logline.it back in last year (July) where it garnered 3 votes which then gave me the confidence to go ahead.

https://loglines.org/logline/when-he-learns-the-one-that-got-away-is-getting-married-a-man-sets-about-winning-her-back-with-the-help-of-the-fiances-ex-only-to-fall-for-her-as-well/

As you can see – the logline has changed. I do honestly reckon the logline always changes when writing.? (Unless it’s just me and I should’ve just stuck to the original. The odd thing is – very organically, it just sort of happened.)

Hopefully – it’s more “primal” (Blake Snyder’s words not mine) going in with the sister. Aristotle too, mentions that “the tragic deed” works best when kept in the family. So that’s Blake and Aristotle on my side (weird, weird pairing).

Okay… let me have it ha.

Note: I’m using Michael Tierno’s interpretation of “the tragic deed” – which is the worst, most horrible thing/physical or emotional suffering that happens to main character or someone main character knows. Regardless – Aristotle still mentions to keep it in the family which is good advice. I mean DEATH WISH works because he loses his wife not his dentist.