Have an account? Sign In Now
Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
After a grisly string of murders, a museum security guard suspects the recent acquisition of a mysterious Egyptian artifact.
Is this the whole thing? I remember a previous version that was more than just a hook. Tor Dollhouse and SydneyPaul had made some great comments on that previous one about goals and stakes.
Is this the whole thing? I remember a previous version that was more than just a hook. Tor Dollhouse and SydneyPaul had made some great comments on that previous one about goals and stakes.
See lessFollowing the arrival of an ancient Egyptian artifact, museum employees begin to get murdered one by one. Now, a security guard who is dissatisfied with her job must solve the murders and catch the killer before she becomes the next victim.
I really like SyndneyPaul and TorDollhouse's comments.
I really like SyndneyPaul and TorDollhouse’s comments.
See lessTo overcome her performance anxiety, a renowned classical pianist pursues an anonymous affair with a man who is sharply skilled at erotic knife-play.
I like nicholasandrewhalls comment. I think you should set the story around a particular event, e.g. terrified of auditioning for the role of [blank], instead of the vague "performance anxiety." Focusing on performing at a particular event will allow the audience to lock on an identifiable goal. ItRead more
I like nicholasandrewhalls comment. I think you should set the story around a particular event, e.g. terrified of auditioning for the role of [blank], instead of the vague “performance anxiety.”
Focusing on performing at a particular event will allow the audience to lock on an identifiable goal. It will also give her a ticking clock, and goes a long way in setting up the stakes (i.e. “this is that one career make/break moment.”).
See less