Hey Nir and DPG —

I understand what you are both saying — but I don’t get that ?”prove her sanity” means ?”…proving that certain powerful people are conspiring for her to be falsely committed” as you suggest it does, Nir. ?This is a specific goal (proving?certain powerful people are conspiring for her to be falsely committed), as opposed to a vague one in ?”Proving her sanity”.

For me, and excuse my lack of imagination, but “Proving her Sanity” creates images of her having to undergo a series of tests or medical exams as the main action to this story…?I’m assuming, with such a rich and deep well of historical stuff to draw on that this would not in fact be the case — I don’t know, I haven’t read the script, could be completely wrong… but I just can’t envisage what “Prove Her Sanity” actually/physically/ objectively MEANS in terms of the REEL (or real) world.

I am a laymen in terms of the actual history, and the logline doesn’t inform me of what her struggle is — ?yes, ok, she has to “Prove her Sanity”, but to who? And given the context of her imprisonment I see her plight (again, as a laymen to the subject matter) as being completely futile — she CAN’T PROVE HER SANITY (and I’m starting to feel that we both — as in, Alice and I, have something in common here… 😉 ) — it doesn’t matter squat — If the chauvinistic powers that be want to shove her away into an insane asylum there is nothing she can do ?- as I said in an earlier post, they aren’t threatening to commit her because she’s insane — THEY KNOW?she’s not?insane– they threaten to commit her because she is threatening their?cosy positions as as masters of the Universe…. and therefore her goal to prove her sanity seems misplaced — surely she knows that she can’t prove her sanity to these people (whoever they may be…)..? All I see that she can do is along the line of what you Nir, have suggested — that she in fact has to prove there is a conspiracy against her — but again, this is not the same thing as “Proving Her Sanity”

I’m sure the story is awesome — the logline, for me, especially as someone not that familiar with this historical figure, ?feels vague, or ?suffers from a misplaced goal ? – that’s all….

Sounds like the script is written DPG — I sincerely wish you the best of luck getting it made. Nir — I respect and appreciate your views and hope my rantings don’t come across as idiotic or unimaginative 🙂 — I’m at my day job and am bored as Hell.

Cheers.

I think it’s potentially a great tale waiting to be told, and i think your alternate version is closer to the mark. My issue is this — ?was it her goal to actually “Prove her sanity?” (and if so, HOW would she specifically go about doing this?) In the asylum she goes on a hunger strike to continue her protest … Isn’t it her goal more along the lines of fighting the current (in 1917) chauvinistic government/ society to influence the amendment to allow woman to vote in the in 1917 General election?… All from the confines of an Insane Asylum..? To me, having her locked up in an asylum and still being prepared to fight the good fight has the potential for deep emotional ground, as opposed to her trying to escape being locked up in an Asylum (which paints her goal as more personal, as opposed to altruistic…)

Either way, I think you could include a specific antagonist she must fight against (either in prison or the asylum…) to personalize/ humanize the logline/ story more — is there someone ?in this story that could wear that mantle?

Below is just my spin, but it’s running on her actually getting committed etc.. (and obviously not your story…)

“Sent to an insane asylum for picketing the White House, an impassioned activist fights torturous conditions and a chauvinistic system in an effort to allow woman a vote in the 1917 general election. (Based on a True Story)”

Anyway — best of luck with this DPG.