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A homicide detective goes on the run to prove his innocence after he’s framed for murder by a malevolent police cyber-intelligence.
Thanks Nir. Everyone's input has been fantastic.
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When a distrusting telepath learns his whole life has been a lie, he must take on the shadowy agency he works for to uncover his real past.
This concept seems similar to a movie called "Push." You may want to put a unique/different spin on the concept to separate your story from Push and others like it. Maybe tell us more about what job the protag is…
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A homicide detective goes on the run to prove his innocence after he’s framed for murder by a malevolent police cyber-intelligence.
Thanks Nir. I see where you're coming from. It seems I have to restructure the logline to set up the world of the story. Maybe something like this: In a future where past homicides can be viewed in real-time, a…
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A homicide detective goes on the run to prove his innocence after he’s framed for murder by a malevolent police cyber-intelligence.
Thanks Russ and Nir Shelter. Great feedback. Hopefully this revision works: Framed for murder, a detective hunts a homicidal scientist he captured and saw executed, who has seemingly returned to launch a new, more terrifying killing spree.
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After killing his boss a concaine enraged drug dealer goes on a sleep deprived 48 hour murderous rampage attempting take control of the drug network.
I like this. Just have a few revisions. After killing his boss, a coked-up drug dealer goes on a sleep deprived rampage murdering his way up to become the next drug kingpin.. I don't think you need 2 day. Maybe…
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Abducted as a small child, a college hoop star must endure a season of unexpected obstacles when he sets out to find his long-lost dad.
How about this? A college hoop star's faith clashes with forgiveness when he discovers that his mother is a fugitive who raised him under an assumed identity.
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A homicide detective goes on the run to prove his innocence after he’s framed for murder by a malevolent police cyber-intelligence.
Thanks Richiev. I like elements of your revised logline. That's pretty incredible that elements within your logline are what happen in the script. My concern with your revision is that it may take too long to get to the protag.…
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Two best friends with Down Syndrome are ecstatic to discover that they have been selected to test Hoogle’s new technology: the Hoogle Hat. But when the hat seems to brainwash the other test subjects, they realize that they are the only people who can stop Hoogle from taking over the world.
How about this? Two best friends with Down Syndrome learn they've been selected to participate in a controversial project that increases intelligence. But when the friends uncover that the doctor running the program is brainwashing his other test subjects, they…
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Abducted as a small child, a college hoop star must endure a season of unexpected obstacles when he sets out to find his long-lost dad.
My questions are, was the hoop star abducted or adopted? If he was abducted, does he know he was abducted or does he just think he was adopted but he was actually abducted? Maybe instead of "unexpected obstacles" you could…
