mrmitchboyer

Initiate · 70 points

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on A mature man who tries to balance working his normal job in the day while working on torturing young woman at night.

First off, I find your premise very intriguing - a man living the double life of office slave by day and torturer by night. Secondly, I agree with toastman, I think you should include more information about the main character…
on With the unwanted help of a little girl in his building, a reclusive retired man with OCD tries to figure out which one of his neighbors keeps dropping cigarette butts onto the patio of his New York city apartment.

This is great!
on On the verge of being alone for the rest of his life, a lazy man falls in love with a miniature woman who lives in the small model city that he finds in the spare bedroom of his new apartment, but when he can’t figure out a way to shrink himself to her size he must push himself to his limits to find a way in, before he loses the girl of his dreams.

Thanks everyone for the comments! Glad you find it interesting! I agree, Richiev, I need to find a deadline. throwitfar - I like the logline you suggested, it helped a lot. I've got some more work to do to tighten…
on A hopelessly bad-tempered aspiring cop in a crime-filled city is bitten by a vampire, giving him the supernatural powers necessary to defeat the criminals overpowering the local police force.

I like the idea of the cop getting a "super power" by becoming a Vampire. Your logline is succinct and clever, leaving me wanting to know more. Very good!
on With the unwanted help of a little girl in his building, a reclusive retired man with OCD tries to figure out which one of his neighbors keeps dropping cigarette butts onto the patio of his New York city apartment.

Thanks! I'll work on cutting it down to size. Glad you like the idea!