DON?T MAKE ME GO
When a single father to a teenage daughter learns that he has a fatal brain tumor, he takes her on a road trip to find the mother who abandoned her years before and to try to teach her everything she might need over the rest of her life.
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This sounds a bit like ‘Life as a house’. I love that film. But the log line is not quite right. How about:
‘When a single father discovers he has a fatal brain tumour, he takes his reluctant teenage daughter on a life changing adventure to find her long absent mother. ….. or something like that. Still not there, though. Could be good film.
Looks like the daughter is overcoming her flaw. I believe the father is the protagonist here. Is it?
It might be better if the Dad knows he has a tumor but doesn’t tell her before forcing her to go on a road trip. Perhaps he’s been absent in the past or maybe he caused his marriage to break down, destroying the family, and now knowing he’s dying wants to make up for lost time before it’s too late.
It will give you the road trip, the father daughter bonding and provide rising tension. Just a thought.
What wilsondownunder said, characters that have secrets helps add depth and subtext to almost everything they do and say, definitely good advice…
“After diagnosed with a brain tumor, a single father takes his troubled daughter on the road to track down mother who abandoned her.”
When a single father is diagnosed with a brain tumor, he takes his teenage daughter on the road trip of their lives.
Heysa everyone! Just so you understand, the logline is an example taken from “The Black List” which you can find over at http://blcklst.com/. It’s a useful tool to compare what you are writing to what is selling/hot.
Sounds great! High stakes, ticking clock, inciting incident. What does he have to overcome to make this happen. He has to overcome something/learn something to get the daughter’s buy in ……
After being diagnosed with a brain tumor, a single father takes his reluctant daughter on the ultimate road trip to track down the mother who abandoned her. But does Mom want to be found?