A promising young writer finds her perfect story in a guy who struggles to find some sense in his own life, she will have to decide who gets the happy ending: her career or herself.

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Write through the heart

23 reviews

Valentin · Mentor · 3,580 pts

When an ambitious young journalist is tasked to investigate a reluctant hero, she discovers secrets that could destroy his new fame. Having fallen in love with him, she struggles between saving her career and destroy him, or losing her dream job and keeping him.

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

>>She doesn't really have a flaw...

If she's human, then by definition, she is flawed.

A protagonist encumbered with a character flaw is well-nigh a requirement in modern dramaturgy. If there is no flaw, then there is no base line for a meaningful and interesting character arc.

In modern dramatic theory, character flaws are supposed to enable the audience to identify and sympathize with the protagonist. The idea being: how can real people, riddled with flaws, identify with a fictional character who doesn't really have a flaw?

Just saying.

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

"A budding journalist intern finds her breakout story in a lonely yet compassionate waiter but when she develops real feelings for him, she'll have to choose between the story of a lifetime or their budding romance.? I thought of this earlier.
She doesn't really have a flaw, she's just human. She can't have both and must decide.

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

No, he knows about the article! They met rather coincidentally and she follows him for a while trying to convince him to help her. He eventually say yes. Of course he struggled because he didn't want to make his life problems public and when he enters this school he asks her to change the name in the story. That's a drama that "easily" is resolved, the bigger problem comes when the co-worker blackmails her.

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

>>not a dirty secret that he has, it's about his depression and suicide attempts,

Okay, but they are still private details that most people so afflicted would never, NEVER want made public. That she would even consider making them public without his full knowledge and consent is not just an act of rank opportunism and exploitation for the sake of her own career aspirations, but also symptomatic of a profound failure of understanding and compassion-- a serious character flaw. (And therein is a story, perhaps different from the one you originally intended to tell.)

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

The writing thing is secondary! It works has the obstacle for the relationship. It is not a dirty secret that he has, it's about his depression and suicide attempts, the thing is: She has to choose between getting the job or the guy. She becomes involved with him and when a co-worker (who's after the job too) finds it, she has to end it. Hence the job vs guy dilemma.

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

Thanks Claude that may have been the most helping answer yet! You got what I wanted with the story.

1. Get the job, lose the guy
2. Lose the job, get the guy

I wasn't looking for story ideas like people have been giving me (not that I don't appreciate them), I just need help figuring out what to put in the logline. I want this to be her journey into realizing that maybe being a journalist at that specifically place isn't what she really wants (even though she dreamed of it her whole life), there's more to life than a job. The writing thing may be secondary here and it works like the set back between their relationship.

Richiev · Singularity · 58,825 pts

dpg, oddly enough that could work for the story line.

The Subject could have been burnt by a reporter in the past, thus his reluctance. The Lead gains his trust and promises to do right by him.

Therefore if she releases the devastating secret. (Or someone else does) she is breaking his trust.

Just some thoughts.

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

Uh, has he given his legal consent to have dirty linen in his private life exposed for public amusement and scrutiny?

Richiev · Singularity · 58,825 pts

How about this:

-----
"After falling for the subject of her breakout story, an ambitions reporter discovers a devastating secret which could win her a Pulitzer but destroy their growing love."
-----

I did leave out the co-worker angle leaving the conflict between her desire for success and her desire for love.

Hope that helped, good luck with this!

Former member · Singularity · 114,968 pts

That's a lot better, great work! I would take out as many adjectives and you can. Tell us who specifically. "Bright yet fragile" would be a good description in the script itself, but for a logline, we need more wow factor. Especially since he is the subject of a story that is going to change our heroine's life.

I think mentioning the co-worker throws off the focus. Think of movies similar to your idea, which have 2 romantic leads and a third, antagonist character, and consider if that character would be mentioned in the logline. If their impact on the story is big enough, definitely include it, otherwise don't.

Hope my 2 cents helps ;)

Former member · Singularity · 114,968 pts

It seems like you are saying if she pursues the assignment and turns in the story, the intern will tell the bosses and she will be discredited since she has a personal relationship with the guy/subject. Doesn't that mean she won't get her dream job then? It seems like her only viable choice is to not go after the dream job and take the guy.

"She has the choice of not be involved with the guy and write the story. Or to be and don't write it."

Her dilemma should be:
1. Get the job, lose the guy
2. Lose the job, get the guy

It seems to me you'd most likely need her to start the story and start the relationship, assuming the relationship is what gives her the upper hand on the story over the intern who is also doing the assignment to get the dream job. If this is a typical rom com scenario, she will get the guy in the end after sacrificing the job. But not before she choose her career by turning in the assignment, causing some end of act 2 drama/conflict. (Though it'd be interesting if you are going in a novel direction, and have her choose her career over the guy and honestly be happy and content)

A suggestion would be to have the situation: if she turns in the assignment and pursues the dream job, she will have to LIE about her relationship with the subject and say it never happened so she DOESN'T lose credibility. That way you have a stronger symmetry between the two outcomes, the job or the guy, dishonesty and honesty. This would also go along with your theme. Is bending her moral compass, denying the relationship ever happened something she is willing to do for the dream job? Or should she be honest at the expense of the job, but she getting the guy.

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

This is what I've come up with;

A promising young journalist finds her breakout story in a bright yet fragile guy but when she starts developing feelings for him she is forced by a co-worker to choose between a relationship with the source or publishing the story."

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

Because there's this intern guy who also wants the job and he discovers the relationship between them and blackmails her. She can't be involved with her sources, it's unethical. So if she decides to publish the story in the journal (I forgot to mention she was a journalist and they both wanted the spot in the journal), the other intern will reveal the relationship to the bosses and she would lose credibility and possibly the job. She has the choice of not be involved with the guy and write the story. Or to be and don't write it.

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

Why not have her sneak it past him (and under the radar of the legal department of the publication) by writing and getting it published as a roman ? clef?

fwiw.

EmpireThinking · Penpusher · 150 pts

It's a non-fiction story. In the start, yes, her objective goal is to earn that job, which will be clear in the beginning of the script, but as we move further she will want another goal (to be with the guy). The theme of the story is something like: Is getting this job worth enough to make you miserable?

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

Is the story fiction or non-fiction? And is this dream job her objective goal, the reason for writing the story?