Following the apocalypse a wayward mid-level servant of the Devil becomes stranded on Earth and is paired with a closet atheist twenty-something from a mormon family and is tasked to collect enough souls to return to Hell.

"Following the apocalypse a wayward mid-level servant of the Devil becomes stranded on Earth and is paired with a closet atheist twenty-something from a mormon family and is tasked to collect enough souls to return to Hell."

Neat concept, just way too much superfluous information. More importantly, genre isn't clear enough.

"A wayward servant of the Devil, trapped on a post-apocalyptic Earth, teams an unsuspecting atheist in an effort to collect souls and return to Hell." (25 words)

If it's meant to be a comedy, you'll have to discover a way to make this concept funnier!

Sounds like potential for a buddy movie comedy in an outlandish almost other worldly setting.

The logline has an unlikely MC a devil's servant, it has even got a buddy the atheist Mormon and he has a task. But no clear goal or AN also the logline has too many words unrelated to the story.

Try opening with the MC and then position him in a post apocalypse world and make the task a do or die. Also try and reduce the MC's description a bit to a more concise and potent description that will tell us a bit more about the character and comic nature of the story.

Here is my suggestion it's not much but I think more in the direction the logline needs to go.

The devil's PA is thrown on a post apocalypse earth tasked with soul collection. He is aided by an atheist Mormon to out collect another devil's servant before being allowed back in hell.