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  1. Posted: May 14, 2015In: Public

    A member of a vigilantly cop network must escape custody and get to the feds before he is killed by his own network after he arrested for carrying out vigilantly justice for the group.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
    Added an answer on May 15, 2015 at 7:08 am

    I started that way but couldn't get it to read well. But starting with the incident is smarter.

    I started that way but couldn’t get it to read well. But starting with the incident is smarter.

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  2. Posted: May 14, 2015In: Public

    When a troubled American expatriate is offered work at the Tengen Hotel, he soon discovers that Tokyo’s most exclusive hotel is also the base of operations for a major crime syndicate. Now embroiled in their conspiracy to appropriate control over the city, the expatriate must choose between duty or sentiment as both his mettle and loyalty are put to the test.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
    Added an answer on May 14, 2015 at 6:05 pm

    If this is a TV series listen to as much "Nerdist Writers Panel Podcast" as you can. Every episode will be gold for you. They interview writers, show runners and creators. And not hacks, people like Vince Gilligan talk about pitching "Breaking Bad". That will be more value than we can add.

    If this is a TV series listen to as much “Nerdist Writers Panel Podcast” as you can. Every episode will be gold for you. They interview writers, show runners and creators. And not hacks, people like Vince Gilligan talk about pitching “Breaking Bad”. That will be more value than we can add.

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  3. Posted: May 12, 2015In: Public

    After a curse is placed on him a suicidal young man must convince his non-committal girlfriend to fall in love with him before he can kill himself.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
    Added an answer on May 14, 2015 at 1:58 pm

    A suicidal young man is cursed preventing him from killing himself. He must convince his non-committal girlfriend to fall in love with him to break the curse so he can die. Don't think it is a nice story. May be a dark comedy. But form a logline point of view, I think you need to get rid of some ofRead more

    A suicidal young man is cursed preventing him from killing himself. He must convince his non-committal girlfriend to fall in love with him to break the curse so he can die.

    Don’t think it is a nice story. May be a dark comedy. But form a logline point of view, I think you need to get rid of some of the “Busy words”. I have tried making it get to the point quicker. Hope this helps.

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