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Okay Mike you have very invaluable suggestions. Here?s another editing. I removed the spiritual identity part, however, it will still be included in the movie itself because that was one area she was being manipulated by. Also the ?deacon? position is important because it?s about the deception of someone high in the church. While his behavior maybe generally unacceptable, it will be a shock in the eyes of the congregation coming from someone who is supposed to be spiritually matured. I can?t seem to get this around 25 words. Urg? A woman raised in an unscrupulous orphanage hopes of happiness were shattered shortly after marrying a highly respected deacon when he suddenly begins to unleash some familiar abuse upon her. She must now muster up the courage to free herself once and for all.
It feels like the story is her mustering up the courage.
It feels like the story is her mustering up the courage.
See lessA toxic marriage, an unsuspecting kid who bears its brunt, and the morally-upright headmistress of the school he studies in, find fortuitous redemption through an unsettling incident ? his suicide.
This is a marketing line and a good one. But it doesn?t tell how the story will show this. After a student suicide a principal and the father go on a road trip. A student kills himself and his family and his school principal open a not for profit but are attacked for being the cause of the suicide.Read more
This is a marketing line and a good one. But it doesn?t tell how the story will show this.
After a student suicide a principal and the father go on a road trip.
A student kills himself and his family and his school principal open a not for profit but are attacked for being the cause of the suicide.
These are stories. May not be good, but we have detail. Give us some details, thanks.
See lessDo you think this would work for a limited tv series?
Not bad. TV series logline is different to a film loglines it needs to define the universe not the story. ?The mother?s goal is just a bit vague. Keep her shit together, means different things to different people.
Not bad. TV series logline is different to a film loglines it needs to define the universe not the story. ?The mother?s goal is just a bit vague. Keep her shit together, means different things to different people.
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