1. Posted: March 7, 2018In:

    After a pandemic infects most of the world a young woman leads a group of survivors to safety as they are hunted by something that can control all the infected.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    I understand the story engine. But what is the ?something? and what does ?safety? mean?

    I understand the story engine. But what is the ?something? and what does ?safety? mean?

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  2. Posted: March 6, 2018In:

    A poor but athletic and mentally strong Sioux tribe heads to Manhattan to destroy a billion dollar hedgefund company in order to give back the land to ten thousands of native americans and american citizens who lost their houses during the financial crisis.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    The ?destroy? is the story. How is he going to do it? Can you tell us, that will impact the feedback.

    The ?destroy? is the story. How is he going to do it? Can you tell us, that will impact the feedback.

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  3. Posted: March 4, 2018In:

    When an armed soldier takes a junior class hostage, two rookie teachers are forced to defend their class.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter

    Rookie is too vague and not appropriate in this situation. Young teachers or student teachers reads better. Defend sounds like a shoot out. Which is a single piece of action. Are they trying to escape? If so, they must defend their children while trying to escape. Does he have them trapped, give usRead more

    Rookie is too vague and not appropriate in this situation. Young teachers or student teachers reads better. Defend sounds like a shoot out. Which is a single piece of action. Are they trying to escape?

    If so, they must defend their children while trying to escape. Does he have them trapped, give us that.

    Trapped by a gunman two student teacher must try escape with their child all the time being hunted.

    Perhaps some emotional goals. It is good, but too basic.

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