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  1. Posted: August 23, 2015In: Public

    When a young woman foresees her community?s catastrophic doom, she must choose between keeping a solemn promise – and telling the life-saving truth.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 23, 2015 at 11:39 am

    I would like to expand on my last comment because loglines describing characters facing a hard decision, a dilemma, are rather common. What's the problem with that? Dilemmas are a bad situation for the character -- but a good situation for the story, right? Dilemmas create conflict, dramatic tensionRead more

    I would like to expand on my last comment because loglines describing characters facing a hard decision, a dilemma, are rather common. What’s the problem with that?

    Dilemmas are a bad situation for the character — but a good situation for the story, right? Dilemmas create conflict, dramatic tension. Dilemmas constitute the moment of truth for a character in terms of his subjective need as well as his objective goal. So, yes, a character who becomes trapped between the horns of an authentic dilemma, where she’s damned if she does, damned if she doesn’t, is a worst case scenario for a character and a best case scenario for a script.

    But the dilemma is not the plot. The dilemma is what the plot builds to. And a logline is about the plot, not what the plot build to, the dilemma.

    Entailed in this version of your logline is a story line that creates a dilemma for your main character. And that’s good. But that’s not the plot. It’s the moment of truth the plot should build to.

    What is the plot of her story that arises from her prophetic revelation? What is the objective goal she strives for that leads to leads her, unwittingly to that dilemma?

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  2. Posted: August 23, 2015In: Public

    The true life misadventures of a couple who try to save their failing marriage and reignite their dull sex life and relationship by daringly moonlighting as an ?escort duo? and experiencing the fantasies of others.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 23, 2015 at 10:22 am

    >>a dramatic and often hilarious erotic journey Specifically what? The logline is a tease without the stripping. That won't work anymore. We live in a jaded era when films have the legal and artistic license to explore just about every angle and aspect of human sexuality in explicit, HD, 3D detail.Read more

    >>a dramatic and often hilarious erotic journey

    Specifically what? The logline is a tease without the stripping. That won’t work anymore. We live in a jaded era when films have the legal and artistic license to explore just about every angle and aspect of human sexuality in explicit, HD, 3D detail.

    So drop the tease and deliver the booty. What’s the sex angle of this story that makes it stand out from all the others? The specific sex angle-hook of “50 Shades of Grey” was BDSM. What’s so special and unique about their erotic journey that differentiates it from all the other erotic journeys in all the other films?

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  3. Posted: August 23, 2015In: Public

    When a young woman foresees her community?s catastrophic doom, she must choose between keeping a solemn promise – and telling the life-saving truth.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on August 23, 2015 at 7:19 am

    So she's mute before her revelation? And can't write? And you still have her goal as choosing (later or sooner) instead of just doing. Dramatic objective goals are about doing -- what comes AFTER the choosing -- not the act of choosing, of deciding. As Yoda told Luke Skywalker in Star Wars: "Do or nRead more

    So she’s mute before her revelation? And can’t write?

    And you still have her goal as choosing (later or sooner) instead of just doing. Dramatic objective goals are about doing — what comes AFTER the choosing — not the act of choosing, of deciding.

    As Yoda told Luke Skywalker in Star Wars: “Do or not do. There is no try”, similarly in loglines, characters do not decide. Characters do not choose. In loglines, they do or not do.

    As a result of the revelation, what does the young woman DO?

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