1. Posted: May 11, 2015In:

    Set in contemporary Japan, an American expatriate finds employment as a bartender at a residential hotel only to discover that it doubles as the base of operations for a major Yakuza syndicate.

    dpg Singularity

    >>only to discover that it doubles as the base of operations for a major Yakuza syndicate. And then what? The discovery is an inciting incident. What does he do about what he discovers? In what way does it change his life going forward. For a television show of this genre the logline not only needsRead more

    >>only to discover that it doubles as the base of operations for a major Yakuza syndicate.

    And then what? The discovery is an inciting incident. What does he do about what he discovers? In what way does it change his life going forward. For a television show of this genre the logline not only needs to establish the situation but suggest where the story line for the main character is going to go.

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  2. Posted: May 10, 2015In:

    A Nanny is mysteriously directed to the wrong house and is demanded to kill captive children for a soul hungry Entity whose time is running out to earn immortality; she must choose to save the children and escape or be tortured, forever captive with them.

    dpg Singularity

    >>>what she really wants for herself and to get it. Which is? What is her objective goal? Emphasis on "objective". That is, a goal that can be visualized so the audience knows she has succeeded (or failed). The visual can be an object (the main character is handed the grand prize) or an event (scoreRead more

    >>>what she really wants for herself and to get it.

    Which is? What is her objective goal? Emphasis on “objective”. That is, a goal that can be visualized so the audience knows she has succeeded (or failed). The visual can be an object (the main character is handed the grand prize) or an event (scores the game winning point). Whatever, it’s got to be visual because film is a visual medium — show don’t tell.

    What’s the visual on “personal power”?

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  3. Posted: May 8, 2015In:

    When her only daughter intends to get married within a month, 50 yrs old widow Neela, who has deep fear of loneliness, must become aware of this fear by stop denying it and then try to face and overcome this fear by accepting the truth that we are all alone so that she can give consent to her daughter's marriage.

    dpg Singularity

    False goals are hard to pull off particularly when the goal is so negative, so driven by negative emotions. Why do you think an audience will want to sit through 90+ minutes of negativity, denial and obstruction before she (finally) comes to her senses. What is so interesting, where's the viewing plRead more

    False goals are hard to pull off particularly when the goal is so negative, so driven by negative emotions. Why do you think an audience will want to sit through 90+ minutes of negativity, denial and obstruction before she (finally) comes to her senses. What is so interesting, where’s the viewing pleasure in that?

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