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After his family is kidnapped and sold to English slavers by renegade Fante tribesmen, Ashanti tribal warrior Mwabo embarks on a perilous voyage across the Atlantic to the sugarcane plantations of modern day Jamaica in search of his wife and son, where he leads a slave rebellion against the tyrannical white masters to reclaim his family's freedom and liberate his fellow Africans from the misery of enslavement.
The host of this site, Karel Segers, offers a script consultant service.
The host of this site, Karel Segers, offers a script consultant service.
See lessAn estranged couple decides for a last-chance counseling retreat in a forest just to meet a therapist who reveals their secrets that should rather have remained buried
Gabor: It is my m.o. to ask for details that I know wouldn't and shouldn't be part of a logline in order to get a better understanding of the concept, to, hopefully, provide useful feedback. And I still don't have a clear, focused view of your concept. Your logline currently reads: An estranged coupRead more
Gabor:
It is my m.o. to ask for details that I know wouldn’t and shouldn’t be part of a logline in order to get a better understanding of the concept, to, hopefully, provide useful feedback.
And I still don’t have a clear, focused view of your concept. Your logline currently reads:
An estranged couple decides for a last-chance counseling retreat in a forest just to experience a therapy that turns into their worst nightmares.
Does that mean the couple are intentionally seeking a therapy that will force them to confront their worst nightmares? Or do they discover that the therapy forces them to confront their worst nightmares — an unintended consequence?
And, again, what is their worst nightmares?
Maybe it shouldn’t be included in the logline, but isn’t EVERY plot (certainly in the horror genre) about a protagonist who MUST confront his worst nightmare, the one thing he fears most? Isn’t that sui generis, the standard psychological dynamic of the modern dramatic formula?
So what differentiates this couple’s nightmares from the 1,001 nightmares faced down by estranged couples in a 1,0001 stories about relationships on the rocks? What makes this story unique from the others?
See lessAn estranged couple decides for a last-chance counseling retreat in a forest just to meet a therapist who reveals their secrets that should rather have remained buried
Alas, for me, now it's too general. What's their 'worst nightmares'? And what is their specific goal? Have they gone to their retreat to smooth over some rough spots in their marriage? Or as the last resort, to save their marriage? Big difference. And who or what plays the role of the antagonist/nemRead more
Alas, for me, now it’s too general. What’s their ‘worst nightmares’? And what is their specific goal? Have they gone to their retreat to smooth over some rough spots in their marriage? Or as the last resort, to save their marriage? Big difference.
And who or what plays the role of the antagonist/nemesis?
What makes this couples retreat different from all the other couples retreats in business?
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