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  1. Posted: December 14, 2014In: Public

    Sophie Lamport, a headstrong, brilliant engineer, accepts her dream job developing a new form of energy storage on an isolated wind farm in Northern Ontario. But on the night of a ferocious windstorm, Sophie encounters a sinister power which changes the course of her research and mental state, forever.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on December 15, 2014 at 5:02 am

    >>> have enough of her goal in Uh, I think not; "changing the course" is vague. By definition, the inciting incident "changes the course" for the protagonist in the plot of every story. What is the specific, unique "change of course" in this story? What MUST he do as a result of that event? And whatRead more

    >>> have enough of her goal in

    Uh, I think not; “changing the course” is vague. By definition, the inciting incident “changes the course” for the protagonist in the plot of every story. What is the specific, unique “change of course” in this story? What MUST he do as a result of that event?

    And what’s at stake? What is won if he succeeds? What is lost if he fails?

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  2. Posted: December 14, 2014In: Public

    Sophie Lamport, a headstrong, brilliant engineer, accepts her dream job developing a new form of energy storage on an isolated wind farm in Northern Ontario. But on the night of a ferocious windstorm, Sophie encounters a sinister power which changes the course of her research and mental state, forever.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on December 15, 2014 at 5:02 am

    >>> have enough of her goal in Uh, I think not; "changing the course" is vague. By definition, the inciting incident "changes the course" for the protagonist in the plot of every story. What is the specific, unique "change of course" in this story? What MUST he do as a result of that event? And whatRead more

    >>> have enough of her goal in

    Uh, I think not; “changing the course” is vague. By definition, the inciting incident “changes the course” for the protagonist in the plot of every story. What is the specific, unique “change of course” in this story? What MUST he do as a result of that event?

    And what’s at stake? What is won if he succeeds? What is lost if he fails?

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  3. Posted: December 14, 2014In: Public

    A night club owner struggles to control her newfound powers while she battles interdimensional beings who seek to tear a hole in the fabric between our world and theirs.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on December 15, 2014 at 4:53 am

    "Struggles to control her newfound powers" seems negative. Suggest it is might be better to frame it more positively in reference to her objective goal: Like "must learn to use her new-found powers to defeat interdimensional beings tearing a hole in the fabric between our world and theirs..." And whRead more

    “Struggles to control her newfound powers” seems negative. Suggest it is might be better to frame it more positively in reference to her objective goal: Like “must learn to use her new-found powers to defeat interdimensional beings tearing a hole in the fabric between our world and theirs…”

    And what’s at stake? Why must she battle the interdimensionals? What are the consequences in tearing a hole in the fabric? Why should we in the viewing audience care or worry about it? Does it mean they are trying to destroy our world? Conquer it? Or…?

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