1. Posted: March 21, 2013In:

    A lost student Les Hertsal at a big university campus trying to find his first class turns into nightmare when no one can help find the room the university is turned upside down in a mysterious campus with no teachers or students.

    dpg Singularity

    Very confusing logline and have no idea what's at stake, why I should care whether he finds the room he's looking for.

    Very confusing logline and have no idea what’s at stake, why I should care whether he finds the room he’s looking for.

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  2. Posted: April 10, 2013In:

    When an approval seeking, metrosexual hairstylist meets his girlfriends manly man family in Finland he must prove his manhood by entering the annual wife carrying competition.

    dpg Singularity

    Right, what's at stake? What does the hairstylist stand to lose if he can't "man up"? It's got to be more than just face.

    Right, what’s at stake? What does the hairstylist stand to lose if he can’t “man up”? It’s got to be more than just face.

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  3. Posted: April 12, 2013In:

    After her friend accidentally discovers time travel through memory research, a habitually cautious woman risks her sanity and ultimately her father's life by returning to her early teen years to prevent her Charlston-socialite mother's murder.

    dpg Singularity

    Why not have the protagonist accidentally discover time travel and then...? Or even intentionally discover it? The logline could be pruned. For instance, "Charleston-socialite" seems extraneous.

    Why not have the protagonist accidentally discover time travel and then…? Or even intentionally discover it?

    The logline could be pruned. For instance, “Charleston-socialite” seems extraneous.

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