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When an idealistic boy tired of bullying establishes a secret club of victims to impart justice, some members of the group begin to turn into very dangerous bullies.
Guillerson:>>>variable, i always thought about the protagonist to be part of bullied onesI think the story is better served if you go with your first instinct, that he thinks he's better than the bullies, has no desire of becoming one of them.? This makes the ironic reversal where he becomeRead more
Guillerson:
>>>variable, i always thought about the protagonist to be part of bullied ones
I think the story is better served if you go with your first instinct, that he thinks he’s better than the bullies, has no desire of becoming one of them.? This makes the ironic reversal where he becomes the kind of person he originally abhorred more dramatically meaningful.
Also I think it might be useful that his secondary motivation is to get The Girl — the “B” story.? In fact, that could be the source of the inciting incident.? He’s been bullied umpteen times, and takes it like the martyr-loser he is at the start of the story.? But when the bullies utterly humiliate him in front of the girl he has a crush on — that triggers him to form the club to not only get revenge, but get The Girl.
Best wishes with this story.
See lessIn a near future dystopian society, when a young adult genetic experiment wakes up in the middle of world war 3 as part of a new kind of army, she has to find out how to end it all.
What does "end it all" mean?
What does “end it all” mean?
See lessIn a futuristic crime-free world rendered paralyzed by digital addiction, an alcoholic policeman, repurposed to chase down individuals who have not met minimum social media popularity, must unravel the mystery behind his daughter?s kidnapping
Who? cares about the mystery?? The story hook is a future where it's illegal not to participate in online social media.? I want to know about "crimes" that arise from not participating.?The logline amounts to a bait and switch.? It sets up a very interesting situation with all kinds of unique plot pRead more
Who? cares about the mystery?? The story hook is a future where it’s illegal not to participate in online social media.? I want to know about “crimes” that arise from not participating.?
The logline amounts to a bait and switch.? It sets up a very interesting situation with all kinds of unique plot possibilities– than switches to a quotidian? plot problem.? ?By quotidian I mean the kidnapping? could occur in 1,001 other possible worlds. It? is not a crime unique to this “Braveless New World” where people must pursue getting “likes” whether they like it or not.
The crime he wants to solve does not seem unique to and derived from the story world set up in the logline.? ?What is there about this kidnapping that is utterly unique, that could occur only in this “Braveless New World”?
fwiw
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