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When a greiving Art Director discovers that a evil new government innitiative, threatens his Film school., he must elliminate the agressors saving S.I.F.A.
I wonder if this could be improved by stating briefly what he has to do to eliminate the aggressors? I'm sure you've made what he must do to eliminate the aggressors something interesting, but 'eliminating the aggressors' could also be done in quite a boring fashion, so I'm still not entirely convinRead more
I wonder if this could be improved by stating briefly what he has to do to eliminate the aggressors?
I’m sure you’ve made what he must do to eliminate the aggressors something interesting, but ‘eliminating the aggressors’ could also be done in quite a boring fashion, so I’m still not entirely convinced I want to watch this film.
Hope this helps.
See lessWhen human terrorists bomb the cybernetic population, a state-committed cybernetic enforcer adopts human form to infiltrate the cell and stop the bombings before billions of his cybernetic kin are murdered.
The beginning was easy to follow- 'When human terrorists bomb the cybernetic population.' The rest was quite dense. eg 'a state- committed cybernetic enforcer.' That is hard to picture immediately in one's mind. I think the 'state- committed,' is apparent by his actions. We may also not need to knowRead more
The beginning was easy to follow- ‘When human terrorists bomb the cybernetic population.’
The rest was quite dense. eg ‘a state- committed cybernetic enforcer.’ That is hard to picture immediately in one’s mind. I think the ‘state- committed,’ is apparent by his actions.
We may also not need to know he adopts human form to infiltrate the cell.
I like your end- states the stakes really well ‘before billions of his cybernetic kin are murdered.’ If it is apparent you are referring to the cybernetic guy, you may even be able to cut cybernetic in ‘cybernetic kin’.
See lessDetermined and short of money, a young boy aims to swim and fly to his dream paradise on the wildest island of Tasmania.
Thank you. That makes sense.
Thank you. That makes sense.
See less