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A young priest journeys with the devil and finds God.
The End. Why is he journeying with Satan? What kick started this adventure? What are they trying to find? Is it a literal journey? Or does he rape, plunder, and pillage for a bit... metaphorically travelling with the devil? Any story where someone sets off on a journey to find something either a) doRead more
The End.
Why is he journeying with Satan? What kick started this adventure? What are they trying to find? Is it a literal journey? Or does he rape, plunder, and pillage for a bit… metaphorically travelling with the devil?
Any story where someone sets off on a journey to find something either a) doesn’t find it but finds something else, b) finds it but it’s not what they expect, or c) realises the thing they set to find was at home all along.
C mostly works with quests of self-discovery – search for happiness or love etc.
So, if, in your priest’s quest, he deliberately sets out to find God, does he find him and he’s not what is expected? Or does he not find him but finds something else?
Either way, this logline could do with expanding so we understand the plot better. Add an inciting incident, what his goal actually is (“to find God”), and what happens if he doesn’t? Don’t give us the ending either. Don’t tell us if he succeeds or not. A logline shouldn’t give away the ending.
Hope this helps.
See lessMany believe the most dreaded words in a hospital are ‘Code Blue, they are wrong. Although serious, they are not even close to those that strike fear in the most hardened hospital administrator: “We are about to exceed ‘Surge Capacity'”.
As mrliteral said. As an additional note, I had no idea that 'Code Blue' are the most dreaded words in a hospital. Why should I know that? Surely this is still a situation that does actually occur and, albeit rare, is still planned for and has a protocol to be followed. Without having the elements mRead more
As mrliteral said.
As an additional note, I had no idea that ‘Code Blue’ are the most dreaded words in a hospital. Why should I know that?
Surely this is still a situation that does actually occur and, albeit rare, is still planned for and has a protocol to be followed. Without having the elements mrliteral mentioned, it’s very difficult to know what the story actually is here and, more importantly, why is this a story worth telling.
See lessTwo directionless twenty-something bartenders are accidentally exposed to information about a fixed horse race and try to take advantage of this potential windfall without tipping their hand to the nasty thugs that planned the caper
Why two? Why not a single protagonist? At 35 words, it's not too long however I do think it could easily be shortened to make it more punchy. So they hear about a fixed horse race, go and place a bet, win big... I get that they don't want to make it obvious and they risk being caught but what else sRead more
Why two? Why not a single protagonist?
At 35 words, it’s not too long however I do think it could easily be shortened to make it more punchy.
So they hear about a fixed horse race, go and place a bet, win big… I get that they don’t want to make it obvious and they risk being caught but what else sustains the 90min+ runtime? I wonder if there is more story after they’ve won the bet. Surely if they win too big (since they’re young and probably greedy, that’s what I imagine has potentially happened) then there’ll be consequences to this? I feel like this is simply the tip of the iceberg and they should get dragged deep into a world they had no intention of finding themselves in.
I like the premise though. I’m based in the UK, so this feels Guy Ritchie-esque like Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels. No idea if that’s what you’re going for.
Go further… what happens next?
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