Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
  • About
  • Questions
  • Answers
  • Best Answers
  1. Posted: July 26, 2019In: Thriller

    When a cynical woman and idealistic man find themselves on a sinking boat far out to sea, they must find a way to work together to survive until help arrives.

    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on July 26, 2019 at 6:35 pm

    Describing these characters as polar opposites and putting them in a situation such as this screams romantic comedy to me. Saying "find themselves on a sinking boat"... it sounds almost like they woke up and they were on the boat. It makes me want to know why they're on the boat and this is actuallyRead more

    Describing these characters as polar opposites and putting them in a situation such as this screams romantic comedy to me.

    Saying “find themselves on a sinking boat”… it sounds almost like they woke up and they were on the boat. It makes me want to know why they’re on the boat and this is actually somewhat irrelevant to the story. Maybe amend this to something like “When they are accidentally left behind on a sinking boat far out to sea….” This then explains something easily which could be a distraction to the main story.

    I would maybe tell the longline from one of these two characters’ perspectives. Although with a cast of mainly 2 it’s not a big deal.

    The final thing – how is this going to sustain a 90min+ runtime. I get that the boat could sink slowly… but surely the plan is “stay on the boat as long as possibly and call for help” what else is there? Don’t most boats have life rafts…? I feel like the situation needs more drama. By saying “until help arrives” suggests that help is on the way already. So it’s really just 2 characters waiting… how thrilling can it be?

    Hope this helps.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  2. Posted: July 25, 2019In: Comedy

    After being suspended from his team, a hockey player disguises himself as a woman and takes the figure skating world by storm, as a Tonya Harding-esque, tough-as-nails new female skater, and in the process, learns how to be a better man.

    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on July 25, 2019 at 5:27 pm

    In a comedy, there are always a few liberties you can take with the truth but, as dpg has pointed out, I think the amount of things to be addressed would be too much for an audience. Why does he do this in the first place? Why does he have to disguise himself as a woman? What's he trying to prove? IRead more

    In a comedy, there are always a few liberties you can take with the truth but, as dpg has pointed out, I think the amount of things to be addressed would be too much for an audience.

    Why does he do this in the first place? Why does he have to disguise himself as a woman? What’s he trying to prove? In “Tootsie”, Dustin Hoffman’s character can’t get hired as a male actor because of his ego, so the only way for him to work (and he’s trying to prove a point – that he’s a great actor and can play any role) is to dress up as a woman. Similarly in Mrs Doubtfire. Robin Williams’ character must dress as a woman to be able to see his children. With both, there’s a desire that fuels the switch. Here…. I can’t see any reason why he HAS to dress as a woman. Immediately, the premise fails.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
  3. Posted: July 24, 2019In: Drama

    A confident woman reaches a small and mysterious motel, where she is forced to take a look back at her life. (Short)

    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on July 24, 2019 at 5:38 pm

    I agree with dpg. The characteristic (in your case "confident") usually hints at their character arc. This is where we get a clue about what their internal, emotional journey is going to be. So if you say confident, the suggestion is perhaps that she will end up lacking confidence. If that isn't theRead more

    I agree with dpg.

    The characteristic (in your case “confident”) usually hints at their character arc. This is where we get a clue about what their internal, emotional journey is going to be. So if you say confident, the suggestion is perhaps that she will end up lacking confidence. If that isn’t the case maybe consider a different word here.

    We definitely need to know who or what is forcing her to look back at her life and why. What is the purpose of this?

    How is this going to work visually? Will we see flashbacks? Or is she just sitting looking nostalgic? Is she talking us through her memories? Visually, I need a clue as to how it’s going to work.

    Hope this helps.

    See less
    • 0
    • Share
      Share
      • Share on Facebook
      • Share on Twitter
      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
1 … 120 121 122 123 124 … 232

Sidebar

Stats

  • Loglines 8,000
  • Reviews 32,189
  • Best Reviews 629
  • Users 3,731

screenwriting courses

Adv 120x600

aalan

Explore

  • Signup

Footer

© 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.