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A disillusioned crusader returns home to find wife in danger of losing her soul.
Agreed with Richiev and DPG. What starts him off on his journey - What event makes him realise that the wife's soul is in danger? Then, as a result of that, what must he do to save her? These are the most important bits of information your logline needs to communicate, but as it is now, they are gloRead more
Agreed with Richiev and DPG.
What starts him off on his journey – What event makes him realise that the wife’s soul is in danger? Then, as a result of that, what must he do to save her?
These are the most important bits of information your logline needs to communicate, but as it is now, they are glossed over with no detail.
See lessWhen faced with life as a sharecropper, a young girl decides to run away and pursue her dream of becoming a musician.
A powerfully motivating event would strengthen the story. Is there something that happened to the girl that motivated her to leave?
A powerfully motivating event would strengthen the story.
See lessIs there something that happened to the girl that motivated her to leave?
When a village wizard is kidnapped by his power hungry brother, his accident-prone niece must learn to trust her abilities and save her uncle, before his energy is used to release a malevolent power.
Gabe,It's important to remember that it's the details of your story that will sell it, not the tropes. The imagery your concept evokes needs to be original yet in line with the genre requirements - that's what creates a 'hook'.I suggest you break your story down and see what about it is original witRead more
Gabe,
It’s important to remember that it’s the details of your story that will sell it, not the tropes. The imagery your concept evokes needs to be original yet in line with the genre requirements – that’s what creates a ‘hook’.
I suggest you break your story down and see what about it is original with in its genre and then how best to describe it visually.
What does “…power hungry…” mean? Or what does it look like??
See less“…trust her abilities…” what abilities? What can she do?
What does “…malevolent power…” look like? What can it do?