


Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
When his sister goes missing during a murderous rampage in a haunted house, an immature teenager must take on the responsibility of finding her before the killer does, but not all is as it seems.
Best to specify an event that propels him into action, "?a murderous rampage?" is too vague in terms of time, place and character involvement. How about: After his best friend is killed by a serial killer, a boy must? or to give it a greater degree of motivation: After his brother is killed by a serRead more
Best to specify an event that propels him into action, “?a murderous rampage?” is too vague in terms of time, place and character involvement.
How about:
After his best friend is killed by a serial killer, a boy must?
or to give it a greater degree of motivation:
After his brother is killed by a serial killer, a boy must…
Once he finds the sister, then what? It doesn’t feel like the story finished, as the danger still exists. Why not make the boy need to catch the killer to put an end to his rampage?
For example:
After his brother is killed by a serial killer his sister goes missing, a fearful boy must then catch the killer on his own if he is to save her.
The only thing I can’t understand is why must the boy find her/save her/do anything on his own? Why doesn’t he call the police?
See lessTwo fed-up women take off for a weekend getaway but when one is almost raped and the other kills the guy the holiday turns into a road trip to escape to Mexico.
Good re work by DPG. It's important to frame the plot between an event at the start of the story and en event at the end - the inciting incident and goal.
Good re work by DPG.
It’s important to frame the plot between an event at the start of the story and en event at the end – the inciting incident and goal.
See lessWhen his murderous ex-wife shows up, a dismissed detective must help the police force catch her.
Agreed with Dkpough1. I'll add that the motivation for the MC to take action is unclear. Why MUST he do anything after she shows up? What's at stake for him?
Agreed with Dkpough1.
I’ll add that the motivation for the MC to take action is unclear. Why MUST he do anything after she shows up? What’s at stake for him?
See less