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After being abandoned by his wife, a middle aged British man relocates to Bangkok and works as a teacher; this move gives him many hilarious experiences.
NaiBKK. As mentioned above, there are a few crucial elements missing in the logline. Being based on real events is a strong point and would make for a great addition to the pitch, however?in this case it may not add much value to the logline. Based on real events strengthens a logline if it's a filmRead more
NaiBKK.
As mentioned above, there are a few crucial elements missing in the logline.
Being based on real events is a strong point and would make for a great addition to the pitch, however?in this case it may not add much value to the logline. Based on real events strengthens a logline if it’s a film telling a?story in a single dramatic premise, but if it is a series then the concept will be sold on the strength of the character not the premise. As characters on screen will be vastly different to those in real life, adding “real”?as a qualifier won’t necessarily help in this case – it’ll only take up precious logline real-estate.
The best way to write logline for a serial concept is by drafting a logline for the pilot. It’s with the pilot that you will establish and sell the characters in the series.
So I suggest you re think your approach, and pick the funniest situation from the lives of the characters then?dramatise it for the screen. After that you can?create a logline for the ?particular premise of the pilot.
Lastly, and as mentioned before in your other posts, avoid such generic descriptions as “…gives him many hilarious experiences?” – they contribute no information about the plot.
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Gaia. I'm not sure what your intentions are, but it seems as if you have not taken on board many of the helpful suggestions made in regards to your concept. As all previous comments still apply, I invite you to study the comments made to your previous post.
Gaia.
I’m not sure what your intentions are, but it seems as if you have not taken on board many of the helpful suggestions made in regards to your concept. As all previous comments still apply, I invite you to study the comments made to your previous post.
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The last revision of the logline is very?wordy,?and?describes too few plot points.I direct?you?to my original comments, describe a single main character with a single goal. ?Also, no names should be mentioned in the logline, unless it's a biopic or based on widely known historical events.Here is a fRead more
The last revision of the logline is very?wordy,?and?describes too few plot points.
I direct?you?to my original comments, describe a single main character with a single goal. ?Also, no names should be mentioned in the logline, unless it’s a biopic or based on widely known historical events.
Here is a formula for you to use, stick to this structure when constructing your next draft:
After an out of the ordinary and significant event happens to a flawed main character, he or she are motivated to take a specific action in order to accomplish a compelling goal.
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