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  1. Posted: July 24, 2016In: Examples

    After a street-wise prostitute agrees to provide a cold-hearted businessman with a week of ‘professional’ companionship, she must struggle to prevent their business relationship from turning into love.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on July 24, 2016 at 3:44 pm

    As an exercise?in dissecting the hook of the story, I agree it's the question; will they end up together? That grabbed the audiences. So perhaps you're right, and the logline should be structured around their relationship as appose to the theme or other goals. As for its "real world" authenticity, iRead more

    As an exercise?in dissecting the hook of the story, I agree it’s the question; will they end up together? That grabbed the audiences.

    So perhaps you’re right, and the logline should be structured around their relationship as appose to the theme or other goals.

    As for its “real world” authenticity, it may have rubbed you the wrong way due to your own life experiences much in the same way as I react to many military or martial arts films.
    Alas, sometimes we need?a zen like approach to be able to disengage the?critical part of our minds if we want to enjoy watching a film for the first time.

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  2. Posted: July 24, 2016In: Examples

    After a street-wise prostitute agrees to provide a cold-hearted businessman with a week of ‘professional’ companionship, she must struggle to prevent their business relationship from turning into love.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on July 24, 2016 at 1:54 pm

    On the surface Pretty Woman is a simple boy meets girl story - an age old crowd favourite. However, I would argue that it is a complex multi?protagonist story?each with their own A plot and B plot.Julia's A plot goal was getting the money she earned as a result of her deal with Richard. Where as herRead more

    On the surface Pretty Woman is a simple boy meets girl story – an age old crowd favourite. However, I would argue that it is a complex multi?protagonist story?each with their own A plot and B plot.

    Julia’s A plot goal was getting the money she earned as a result of her deal with Richard. Where as her B plot was getting the love interest that Richard became after the mid point of act 2, and the C plot was paying the rent with her party animal flat mate.

    Richard’s A plot was to seal the big deal he was working on, whereas his B plot was getting Julia as part of the love story.

    As both of their B plot’s shard the same goal, it provided a sort of compound effect, which in turn made it more prominent for most viewers.

    Point is I think your instinct to write a logline for both of the characters is right. In multi protagonist stories the writer can and should write a logline for each protagonist.

    I believe the love story is used to?comment?on class segregation, both characters tackle the differences between the classes from different points of view.

    She stands out in the rich and snooty crowd like a sore thumb, and Richard needs to either accept her as she is or lose her:
    After a cold-hearted businessman falls in love with a street-wise prostitute he must learn to accept her into his life warts and all or risk losing her forever.

    For Julia the challenge is to fit in the new environment, yet still remain true to herself:
    After a street-wise prostitute falls in love with a rich business man she must learn to shed her inferiority complex around his friends or risk losing him forever.

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  3. Posted: July 23, 2016In: Examples

    When her family railroad falls apart, a driven woman fights against her incompetent brother, increasing regulation and mysteriously disappearing businessmen, to save her family business. -Atlas Shrugged-

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on July 24, 2016 at 1:37 pm

    I haven't seen this film, and while it sounds interesting it's hard to gauge?the story from reading the logline mostly because it doesn't detail what the main action is. The main character is clear and her goal is clear, but what does she actually do to achieve it? What does "...battle her brother?"Read more

    I haven’t seen this film, and while it sounds interesting it’s hard to gauge?the story from reading the logline mostly because it doesn’t detail what the main action is.

    The main character is clear and her goal is clear, but what does she actually do to achieve it?

    What does “…battle her brother?” mean in practical terms? Does she try to buy her brother’s shares in the company? Does she find investors on her own accord? Does she use political or social pressure to convince him to agree with her suggestions?

    Same with the oppressive government? Does she grease a few political wheels? Does she blackmail a politician – unlikely from what the logline is describing, but it’s an example of an action she could take.

    Lastly it would be great to know her flaw. Does she have a character flaw? If so what is it?

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